Hmmm... how long has it been since I posted about telling my son that I'd love him if he never did any housework? (and it wasn't a guilt trip, and I could tell that he knew that by the look on his face) I had made peace with the fact that my house may just be messier than I would ideally like for a while, maybe a long while, until I got the time to clean it. But it turns out that once the pressure of control was off, I didn't have to wait for a clean house. It came to me from my loving son.
This morning he got up before me, and cleaned the living room and the kitchen. Yes, I am smug. A happy smug. Not because I "got him to do what I wanted to"... but because I have seen evidence of the fact that parents and children do not have to be in opposing places. We do not have to be controlling each other. We can work together.
I used to think that there were only two options... I told them what to do and when to do it, or they ran over me.... Now I know that my children are whole caring individuals. They are not split into two parts, good and evil that constantly battle each other, and the evil will win if I do not intervene.
They are people just like me. They are naturally social and self preserving at the same time. They naturally want to please themselves AND others.
What a relief to not have to fight for control, and be unhappy when they make decisions that I am not happy with. I can just live my life in direct connection with theirs, peacefully, being thankful for what I have, and not feeling bad about what isn't going my way. Life is good.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Addendum to "Another Key?"
Last night I had a conversation with one of my DS's (online lingo for Dear Son, if you are not familiar with that particular abbreviation). I was trying to figure out why it is that he does not want to do housework. I was not trying to guilt trip him (although I've had a history of that, so had to apologize for it coming across as such), but I wanted an answer as to why although work does not sound appealing to him (I supposed it was because he is a "kid", and as such is diabolically opposed to working), why can he not look at it as something that he does for his family and allow that to override his desire to not do something he considers boring.
He could not understand how I can not understand why he doesn't want to do housework. Then when I kept pushing the point of doing it anyway for someone else rather than yourself, he brought up that work done with motivation is done willingly, and considered fun. I asked him what would motivate him to do housework, because having a clean house is something that is very important to me. I compared it to how he used to fret over having to wait until Friday to play video games (they play whenever the mood strikes them now). He would pine away to play it, but it didn't happen until Friday. I told him that I pine away after a clean house (not in so many words, but I am paraphrasing here), but it seems like no one really cares if the house is clean or not except me, because given the choice, he and his siblings prefer to play all day.
(Now, I know that modern society would say, well of course! that's what kids do! they hate work! BUT I no longer believe that this is an unchangeable attribute of kids. I believe now that kids will work willingly beside their parents, and sometimes (or maybe a lot of the time) without EVEN being asked. Sound impossible? Read on.)
OK, again.... I asked him what would motivate him to do more housework (just as a question, not a whiny complaint :)
He replied that usually he doesn't have motivation. What has motivated him multiple times in the past to spend a half hour cleaning the house without even being asked
is the fact that he was anticipating surprising me, and loving that I would love seeing it done.
I assured him that regardless of the fact that it is not a surprise, any housework that he does is VERY MUCH APPRECIATED.
He then went on to say (and I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the fact that he is so very honest with me!) that yes, he knows that, but the motivation for him is that the work is more fun FOR HIM when it is done as a surprise for me. I love it that he is reminding me that his motivation needs to come from INSIDE him, not from the outside!
I felt such a love for him right then that I was able to honestly say that I love him whether he does any housework or not. And in reality that has been and always will be the truth. But my overwhelming desire to have a clean house has stopped my flow of love so much so that I would not have been able to verbally affirm that to him before. I told him that I want him to do housework whenever he is motivated internally to, and I am willing to wait for that. And I meant it.
I am willing to wait for months or years or longer if it takes it, but I doubt that it will. I have since realized a big key for as to why kids hate work! Here it is : (drumroll)........ ADULTS HATE WORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How many times have we acknowledged that children copy people older than themselves? Isn't it natures way of teaching them? Even if you never say a word to them about how to do anything... if you do it, they will learn by observation!!!! This is KEY! We adults push kids to do work... do your homework! Wash the dishes! Clean your room! Make your bed! Pick that stuff up! And all the while, we are COMPLAINING to them telling them how we work even though we don't really want to get up early in the morning and work all day... we would rather be home playing with them too, but that's just not how life works! We would rather not have to clean the house, or do bills, but life requires money, and we have to make it!!! Just think about this for a minute. I bet you could make a list a mile long of how many times you have said in a thousand different ways to your kids that life is work. And work is not fun. But sometimes we do things because they need done, not to enjoy them....
Kids have a natural reaction... YUCK! WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO LIVE LIKE THAT? HOW HORRIBLE! My kids have asked me multiple times, "Why do you work then? Why don't you just not do it???"
My conditioned mental response was always... "they just don't understand life yet. Kids just have it too easy. They don't understand making yourself do something just because it needs done. They haven't matured yet...."
You know what I say? @#$%%^$# (I mean, hogwash!! :) Yes, kids have not been conditioned YET to do things that they don't want to do.... GOOD FOR THEM!!!! We should all be so lucky! And as conditioned adults, we have the option to change our conditioning. And I am so glad that I am realizing that my kids' point of view on this particular thing is wiser than mine. (Did I just say that?) Yes. I did. Not that I think that in general "kids are smarter than adults". but it is a fact that SOMEtimes, regardless of experience, someone with less experience than you has a different point of view, and it just clicks, and you say, "HUH. They are actually right!" And you put away your pride at being the 'one with more experience' (and you know that inside you secretly think that this makes you just a little bit smarter than someone less experienced)... and you just go with what makes more sense. No matter who it was that thought of it.
And in this case, I am thinking about the wisdom of all those "make yourself more happy" books that tell you that you need to ENJOY your life EVERY MINUTE to be happy. EVEN WHILE YOU ARE WORKING!!! And I think I do that to some degree.
BUT OBVIOUSLY NOT TO THE DEGREE THAT MY KIDS SEE IT! Like I said in a previous post. I have asked them straight out... "Do you think that mom likes to work?" Their honest answer was "NO. You don't act like it." And they are right! When they ask me to play, I reply, "No, I can't right now, I HAVE to work." I don't say, well, mom is doing this right now. I want to have clean dishes, so I'm washing them. (said with a nonchalant, if not "I'm enjoying this" attitude). I come across to them as frustrated that I HAVE to do this work, and it's not fair that they get to sit around and play all day while I have to work all day!
And my husband gives them a similar outlook, although he probably does not come across as so bitter about it on a daily basis. (This is because I resent the kids for choosing not to help me, taking their lack of desire to do things not appealing, as a lack of respect for me, when that is CERTAINLY not their intention. They tell me all the time what a great mom I am! :)
Anyway, my husband comes across to them (at least from my point of view, I haven't actually asked them if THEY think that he enjoys working), as if work is not really enjoyable, he'd rather be home with them... but he does it because we need the money. So, from the kids POV, he lives a pretty miserable life in order to sustain us all, and when he tells them loudly that this is so, when they tell him that they don't want to help with the signs on the truck, he is only reinforcing that view. Same as I reinforce it EVERY SINGLE DAY when I ask them to help with the housework. And then I doubly reinforce it when I get upset with them for not wanting to help and complain that I am the only one doing "ALL the work" around the house....
What a predicament we've gotten ourselves into. :) But happily, there is a way out. And as with all natural remedies that work from the inside out, instead of from the outside in (think medicinal remedies) it will take a little longer than the usual remedy of "You need to help us do this work because you are part of the family, and you SHOULD feel responsible as such... don't you partake in the goodness of being part of the family??? don't you think you should help us??? why don't you want to help us???? Guilt trip, guilt trip, guilt trip!!! But we don't realize this is what we are doing! We are just saying what we feel.
Then the kid says what they feel. "I want to help you mom, but it's boring!" In other words (that they lack the maturity/experience to verbalize more clearly), "I naturally want to help you, but I also naturally want to do what is enjoyable in my life, and these two things are clearly opposing based on how you show me what work is like, and therefore, I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place!"
What can we do in this situation? I believe that the answer is surefire. It just takes time. First of all, You as the parent need to ENJOY YOUR LIFE! (i.e. see all those self help books for ways to do that, I don't have the time here). As you begin enjoying your life, you will naturally put off the vibe that you ARE ACTUALLY enjoying your life. And because kids naturally copy (and especially quickly they copy what looks like fun), you will soon have a hive of worker bees who love working.
Sound unrealistic? Well, that's because you make it look like shovelling so much #%$# to live everyday life. Be happy, darn it! And your kids will naturally follow.
Maybe I can clarify this more later on, but my little girl just woke up, and I don't want to sit here typing forever, ignoring her.
Live in peace,
Michelle
He could not understand how I can not understand why he doesn't want to do housework. Then when I kept pushing the point of doing it anyway for someone else rather than yourself, he brought up that work done with motivation is done willingly, and considered fun. I asked him what would motivate him to do housework, because having a clean house is something that is very important to me. I compared it to how he used to fret over having to wait until Friday to play video games (they play whenever the mood strikes them now). He would pine away to play it, but it didn't happen until Friday. I told him that I pine away after a clean house (not in so many words, but I am paraphrasing here), but it seems like no one really cares if the house is clean or not except me, because given the choice, he and his siblings prefer to play all day.
(Now, I know that modern society would say, well of course! that's what kids do! they hate work! BUT I no longer believe that this is an unchangeable attribute of kids. I believe now that kids will work willingly beside their parents, and sometimes (or maybe a lot of the time) without EVEN being asked. Sound impossible? Read on.)
OK, again.... I asked him what would motivate him to do more housework (just as a question, not a whiny complaint :)
He replied that usually he doesn't have motivation. What has motivated him multiple times in the past to spend a half hour cleaning the house without even being asked
is the fact that he was anticipating surprising me, and loving that I would love seeing it done.
I assured him that regardless of the fact that it is not a surprise, any housework that he does is VERY MUCH APPRECIATED.
He then went on to say (and I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the fact that he is so very honest with me!) that yes, he knows that, but the motivation for him is that the work is more fun FOR HIM when it is done as a surprise for me. I love it that he is reminding me that his motivation needs to come from INSIDE him, not from the outside!
I felt such a love for him right then that I was able to honestly say that I love him whether he does any housework or not. And in reality that has been and always will be the truth. But my overwhelming desire to have a clean house has stopped my flow of love so much so that I would not have been able to verbally affirm that to him before. I told him that I want him to do housework whenever he is motivated internally to, and I am willing to wait for that. And I meant it.
I am willing to wait for months or years or longer if it takes it, but I doubt that it will. I have since realized a big key for as to why kids hate work! Here it is : (drumroll)........ ADULTS HATE WORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How many times have we acknowledged that children copy people older than themselves? Isn't it natures way of teaching them? Even if you never say a word to them about how to do anything... if you do it, they will learn by observation!!!! This is KEY! We adults push kids to do work... do your homework! Wash the dishes! Clean your room! Make your bed! Pick that stuff up! And all the while, we are COMPLAINING to them telling them how we work even though we don't really want to get up early in the morning and work all day... we would rather be home playing with them too, but that's just not how life works! We would rather not have to clean the house, or do bills, but life requires money, and we have to make it!!! Just think about this for a minute. I bet you could make a list a mile long of how many times you have said in a thousand different ways to your kids that life is work. And work is not fun. But sometimes we do things because they need done, not to enjoy them....
Kids have a natural reaction... YUCK! WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO LIVE LIKE THAT? HOW HORRIBLE! My kids have asked me multiple times, "Why do you work then? Why don't you just not do it???"
My conditioned mental response was always... "they just don't understand life yet. Kids just have it too easy. They don't understand making yourself do something just because it needs done. They haven't matured yet...."
You know what I say? @#$%%^$# (I mean, hogwash!! :) Yes, kids have not been conditioned YET to do things that they don't want to do.... GOOD FOR THEM!!!! We should all be so lucky! And as conditioned adults, we have the option to change our conditioning. And I am so glad that I am realizing that my kids' point of view on this particular thing is wiser than mine. (Did I just say that?) Yes. I did. Not that I think that in general "kids are smarter than adults". but it is a fact that SOMEtimes, regardless of experience, someone with less experience than you has a different point of view, and it just clicks, and you say, "HUH. They are actually right!" And you put away your pride at being the 'one with more experience' (and you know that inside you secretly think that this makes you just a little bit smarter than someone less experienced)... and you just go with what makes more sense. No matter who it was that thought of it.
And in this case, I am thinking about the wisdom of all those "make yourself more happy" books that tell you that you need to ENJOY your life EVERY MINUTE to be happy. EVEN WHILE YOU ARE WORKING!!! And I think I do that to some degree.
BUT OBVIOUSLY NOT TO THE DEGREE THAT MY KIDS SEE IT! Like I said in a previous post. I have asked them straight out... "Do you think that mom likes to work?" Their honest answer was "NO. You don't act like it." And they are right! When they ask me to play, I reply, "No, I can't right now, I HAVE to work." I don't say, well, mom is doing this right now. I want to have clean dishes, so I'm washing them. (said with a nonchalant, if not "I'm enjoying this" attitude). I come across to them as frustrated that I HAVE to do this work, and it's not fair that they get to sit around and play all day while I have to work all day!
And my husband gives them a similar outlook, although he probably does not come across as so bitter about it on a daily basis. (This is because I resent the kids for choosing not to help me, taking their lack of desire to do things not appealing, as a lack of respect for me, when that is CERTAINLY not their intention. They tell me all the time what a great mom I am! :)
Anyway, my husband comes across to them (at least from my point of view, I haven't actually asked them if THEY think that he enjoys working), as if work is not really enjoyable, he'd rather be home with them... but he does it because we need the money. So, from the kids POV, he lives a pretty miserable life in order to sustain us all, and when he tells them loudly that this is so, when they tell him that they don't want to help with the signs on the truck, he is only reinforcing that view. Same as I reinforce it EVERY SINGLE DAY when I ask them to help with the housework. And then I doubly reinforce it when I get upset with them for not wanting to help and complain that I am the only one doing "ALL the work" around the house....
What a predicament we've gotten ourselves into. :) But happily, there is a way out. And as with all natural remedies that work from the inside out, instead of from the outside in (think medicinal remedies) it will take a little longer than the usual remedy of "You need to help us do this work because you are part of the family, and you SHOULD feel responsible as such... don't you partake in the goodness of being part of the family??? don't you think you should help us??? why don't you want to help us???? Guilt trip, guilt trip, guilt trip!!! But we don't realize this is what we are doing! We are just saying what we feel.
Then the kid says what they feel. "I want to help you mom, but it's boring!" In other words (that they lack the maturity/experience to verbalize more clearly), "I naturally want to help you, but I also naturally want to do what is enjoyable in my life, and these two things are clearly opposing based on how you show me what work is like, and therefore, I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place!"
What can we do in this situation? I believe that the answer is surefire. It just takes time. First of all, You as the parent need to ENJOY YOUR LIFE! (i.e. see all those self help books for ways to do that, I don't have the time here). As you begin enjoying your life, you will naturally put off the vibe that you ARE ACTUALLY enjoying your life. And because kids naturally copy (and especially quickly they copy what looks like fun), you will soon have a hive of worker bees who love working.
Sound unrealistic? Well, that's because you make it look like shovelling so much #%$# to live everyday life. Be happy, darn it! And your kids will naturally follow.
Maybe I can clarify this more later on, but my little girl just woke up, and I don't want to sit here typing forever, ignoring her.
Live in peace,
Michelle
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Another Key?
I think my husband may have given me a very important key tonight. Not a physical key, a mental key. I came home from a visit with some people whom I dearly love and hold in high respect, yet I called him immediately to complain to him so I could rid myself of the angst I was feeling from being around them... How does this make sense? He explained it to me.
He said that all I have been doing lately is complaining about this one aspect of their personalities that I do not like. I never come home and call him to tell him what a good time we had together... it's always about how they made this or that comment that I didn't care for because it opposed my views, and I felt like they were attacking me by disagreeing with me, or at least trying to convince me that they were right and that my point of view is wrong. Not different, but wrong.
He made me realize that what I have been expecting is for them to change their views, (at least the view that their way is the only right way in discipline and human nature) and that just 12 months ago, I was in full support of their views.
I have made a radical change in that short time. Probably a 180. I am the one who has made the change, not them. Therefore, I need to back off off the preachiness. I don't want to come off as a total bitch who wants to do nothing but argue. How am I supposed to convey my love for them if I'm so busy trying to combat their points of view?
I have been trying to fight fire with fire, and all that's been happening is that our relationship burns up. As hard as it is for my personality (also one that tends to see only one right way to do anything), I need to throw some water on their fire for the sake of our relationship. And I can do that practically by just nodding my head when they make comments I don't agree on, and/or letting it roll off of me when they show their 'authority' over my kids.... I need to develop a thicker skin. Not get so frustrated so easily, or so mad so easily...
All this time I was thinking that it wasn't going to get better unless they just accepted that I am going to be different from them... I was blind to the fact that things CAN get better, if I just accept that they are different from me! :) Don't think of them as WRONG... just DIFFERENT.
That's the whole concept I've been trying to preach at everyone for the whole 12 months (give or take a few months) that I've believed it, and here, right in the homefront, I've been ignoring it. Kind of like screaming at the guy to get the mote out of his eye when I've got a beam in mine.. :) There you go, James, I just found a Biblical scripture that applies to me, and I don't even hate it! :) Thought you'd like to see that one. :)
I wanted to write this all down so I don't forget this lesson that my husband brought to mind this evening, and also because it applies in another situation.
Let's see if I can remember the exact words he used.... "How are you supposed to win them over to your side if you are just fighting them continually? If you want to convince them of your viewpoint (that all viewpoints are equally valid), then you need to show them love and give them time, not keep preaching at them. Be the bigger person, and show some softness. Wouldn't you like it if they did that?"
He's so totally right!
And he helped me deal with the situation I've been having about my messy house angst! And the kids helping bring in the groceries angst, etc... the things that I would like to see done, but they just aren't high priorities on my kids' lists of things to see done. :)
I was sitting there watching them play in the living room today, and I thought to myself, what if I looked at what they are doing as just as important as the things that grown ups do? Would I call up my sister or mother in law, and ask them to stop what they are doing and come help me clean my house whenever I want it clean? 3 times a day? Just because they are in the near vicinity?
Would I call them up and guilt them by saying how I just HATE HATE HATE a messy house, and I've been SOOOOO busy with my cookie business (which I choose to do), and my Ebay sales (which I choose to do), could they please show me how they love me by coming over to help me clean?
No. I wouldn't. that would be imposing on them. That would be interupting their agendas to get mine accomplished.
Also, when my mother in law saw selfish ways in me as a teen, did she constantly bring it up? Did she point out almost every little time that my voice had a mean tone, or that I didn't offer anyone some of the dessert I was eating, and tell me how that was selfish? NO!
What have I been thinking? I have been creating a lot of the tension that is in my house by trying to enforce my DESIRES onto the children. I WANT to have a cookie business. I WANT to have a clean house. I do NOT agree with the principle that you should control your children. I do NOT want to MAKE them do what I want them to do.
I want to TRUST that they will learn through seeing me model the "right" actions how to treat people. And how can I EVER expect them to enjoy work, and do it cheerfully, when all they ever hear me say about it is how it's not fair that they just get to sit around and watch videos and play video games all day, and I HAVE to do all the WORK! I've even asked them if they think that I enjoy work, and they said no. Of course not! I don't act like it's fun... how are they supposed to WANT to do it if I make it out to be such drudgery? I've taken the first step towards them learning to do it on their own accord (I've given them the choice). Now I just need to give them the time they inividually need to observe my attitude about work, and be naturally attracted to it, instead of repelled by my current attitude of it. I saw principle at work the other night when we all had the greatest fun doing the hard physical labor of taking off and putting on signs for 4 and a half hours....
These things all go hand in hand. It's a matter of attracting the situation you want by putting out the vibe that you want to have come to you.... I suppose you could say it's another version of the old Biblical adage "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." :)
Boy, I feel like I'm hitting a growth spurt! :) Thanks, James, for the key to that particular lock!
He said that all I have been doing lately is complaining about this one aspect of their personalities that I do not like. I never come home and call him to tell him what a good time we had together... it's always about how they made this or that comment that I didn't care for because it opposed my views, and I felt like they were attacking me by disagreeing with me, or at least trying to convince me that they were right and that my point of view is wrong. Not different, but wrong.
He made me realize that what I have been expecting is for them to change their views, (at least the view that their way is the only right way in discipline and human nature) and that just 12 months ago, I was in full support of their views.
I have made a radical change in that short time. Probably a 180. I am the one who has made the change, not them. Therefore, I need to back off off the preachiness. I don't want to come off as a total bitch who wants to do nothing but argue. How am I supposed to convey my love for them if I'm so busy trying to combat their points of view?
I have been trying to fight fire with fire, and all that's been happening is that our relationship burns up. As hard as it is for my personality (also one that tends to see only one right way to do anything), I need to throw some water on their fire for the sake of our relationship. And I can do that practically by just nodding my head when they make comments I don't agree on, and/or letting it roll off of me when they show their 'authority' over my kids.... I need to develop a thicker skin. Not get so frustrated so easily, or so mad so easily...
All this time I was thinking that it wasn't going to get better unless they just accepted that I am going to be different from them... I was blind to the fact that things CAN get better, if I just accept that they are different from me! :) Don't think of them as WRONG... just DIFFERENT.
That's the whole concept I've been trying to preach at everyone for the whole 12 months (give or take a few months) that I've believed it, and here, right in the homefront, I've been ignoring it. Kind of like screaming at the guy to get the mote out of his eye when I've got a beam in mine.. :) There you go, James, I just found a Biblical scripture that applies to me, and I don't even hate it! :) Thought you'd like to see that one. :)
I wanted to write this all down so I don't forget this lesson that my husband brought to mind this evening, and also because it applies in another situation.
Let's see if I can remember the exact words he used.... "How are you supposed to win them over to your side if you are just fighting them continually? If you want to convince them of your viewpoint (that all viewpoints are equally valid), then you need to show them love and give them time, not keep preaching at them. Be the bigger person, and show some softness. Wouldn't you like it if they did that?"
He's so totally right!
And he helped me deal with the situation I've been having about my messy house angst! And the kids helping bring in the groceries angst, etc... the things that I would like to see done, but they just aren't high priorities on my kids' lists of things to see done. :)
I was sitting there watching them play in the living room today, and I thought to myself, what if I looked at what they are doing as just as important as the things that grown ups do? Would I call up my sister or mother in law, and ask them to stop what they are doing and come help me clean my house whenever I want it clean? 3 times a day? Just because they are in the near vicinity?
Would I call them up and guilt them by saying how I just HATE HATE HATE a messy house, and I've been SOOOOO busy with my cookie business (which I choose to do), and my Ebay sales (which I choose to do), could they please show me how they love me by coming over to help me clean?
No. I wouldn't. that would be imposing on them. That would be interupting their agendas to get mine accomplished.
Also, when my mother in law saw selfish ways in me as a teen, did she constantly bring it up? Did she point out almost every little time that my voice had a mean tone, or that I didn't offer anyone some of the dessert I was eating, and tell me how that was selfish? NO!
What have I been thinking? I have been creating a lot of the tension that is in my house by trying to enforce my DESIRES onto the children. I WANT to have a cookie business. I WANT to have a clean house. I do NOT agree with the principle that you should control your children. I do NOT want to MAKE them do what I want them to do.
I want to TRUST that they will learn through seeing me model the "right" actions how to treat people. And how can I EVER expect them to enjoy work, and do it cheerfully, when all they ever hear me say about it is how it's not fair that they just get to sit around and watch videos and play video games all day, and I HAVE to do all the WORK! I've even asked them if they think that I enjoy work, and they said no. Of course not! I don't act like it's fun... how are they supposed to WANT to do it if I make it out to be such drudgery? I've taken the first step towards them learning to do it on their own accord (I've given them the choice). Now I just need to give them the time they inividually need to observe my attitude about work, and be naturally attracted to it, instead of repelled by my current attitude of it. I saw principle at work the other night when we all had the greatest fun doing the hard physical labor of taking off and putting on signs for 4 and a half hours....
These things all go hand in hand. It's a matter of attracting the situation you want by putting out the vibe that you want to have come to you.... I suppose you could say it's another version of the old Biblical adage "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." :)
Boy, I feel like I'm hitting a growth spurt! :) Thanks, James, for the key to that particular lock!
Monday, January 07, 2008
An Unschooling Day in the January Spring
It's almost 11pm. My children are all asleep except for the older two. Jesse is waiting for me to finish my blogging and internet reading, and Travis is falling asleep. Jesse will be sleeping in my bed tonight (along with Nathan, who is still breastfeeding). My wonderful husband, who normally shares my bed, is in Chicago again - working hard for his family. Actually, at this moment, he's enjoying the Ohio Buccs football game. (Of course he'd be enjoying it more if they were winning :)...
My whole house smells WONDERFUL! We had a REALLY nice day for an Ohio winter today. 63 degrees and some sunshine!! What a rare treat!
Savannah, Jesse, Jaidyn, Nathan, and I went for a walk to visit Jaidyn's BEST, Markieloaf. Translated from 3 year old speak, it's her cousin... her best friend, whose name is Mark, but whom she has dubbed Markieloaf.... :)
He recently broke his elbow in a freak horseback riding accident at the ripe old age of 2 and a half. It occured in his living room, on the back of his loving, used to be overprotective, mother! What a thing. Poor kid had to have surgery to pin his elbow back together. But I heard from a close source that both he and Mom (his mom) took it wonderfully, with only a minimal amount of crying on both of their parts. :) If you are reading this Laura, I commend you. You are a wonderful mom.
ANYWAY... back to our wonderful rare spring day in the beginning of January in this temperate climate.... We walked to Markieloaf's house, only to find the he wasn't home. Pinned little arm, and all, he must have been out shopping. Maybe he got stir crazy! :) So, we decided that a little excercise in the fresh air would do us good, and we snuck inside their house to find some gardening tools. (thier front door is usually open). All I could find was a hammer, and a rubber glove, but these served well enough for us to help them pull the little pricker weeds out of their front landscaping. At least the obvious stuff as you are going up the front walk. Savannah, Jaidyn, and I had fun pulling them out, dumping them in their trash can, and then sweeping their walk for them with a broom that I found in their laundry room. I hope they don't mind the dirt we left on their broom, and in the claw of their hammer! We left as much dirt as we could in their landscaping. :)
While digging out the weeds, I found a SAM! This is Jaidyn speak for a WORM. She and Savannah transported it to our house in the stroller's cupholder, with enough wet dirt for it to enjoy on the way. They then stayed outside digging in the dirt for more sams for quite a while. The warm weather attracted all the kids outside eventually to lay on the deck in a pile of blankets and pillows. They took turns serving each other the cut up apples and peanut butter sandwiches I made for them (well, to give credit where credit is due, Travis actually finished making the sanwiches by putting on the jelly). They were each the servant or the royalty getting served at one time or another. What a beautiful thing to watch my children play together.
Well, I am getting tired now, and I want to reserve my energy for the week. I'll have to blog later. But quickly before I go... for recording purposes, I'd like to mention that we worked on geometry this week. Jesse, Travis, Savannah, and I sat around the kitchen table with Jesse's 6th grade textbook, playing with angles and 3D shapes, measuring, drawing, and discussing the angles of rollercoasters and rooflines, and how many faces an object had. Travis drew a triangle, and Jesse a cylinder. They needed no help, they drew them quite naturally. Drawing 3D has always been difficult for me... maybe I'll learn now! :)
Oh yes! Jaidyn is learning her numbers! She loves to call Markiloaf all the time, at least once a day, and she has his phone number partially memorized, and can pick out some of the numbers. She asked me to write down some phone numbers the other day so that she could see what they looked like. She wanted Markie's, Bella Roses', Grandpa and Grandma Schooling's, Aunt Nonan's, Grandma Frase's, and Grandpa Hach's.... What a thrill to see your child seeking an education from you! She's been able to count to 10 and higher for quite some time now, and she can sing her ABC's. I am looking forward to when she starts pointing out letters and naming them.
Maybe I'll get out the spell and say that Aaron learned his letters on at 4 years old. :) He is reading short phrases now.
Ok, bed time. Good night.
My whole house smells WONDERFUL! We had a REALLY nice day for an Ohio winter today. 63 degrees and some sunshine!! What a rare treat!
Savannah, Jesse, Jaidyn, Nathan, and I went for a walk to visit Jaidyn's BEST, Markieloaf. Translated from 3 year old speak, it's her cousin... her best friend, whose name is Mark, but whom she has dubbed Markieloaf.... :)
He recently broke his elbow in a freak horseback riding accident at the ripe old age of 2 and a half. It occured in his living room, on the back of his loving, used to be overprotective, mother! What a thing. Poor kid had to have surgery to pin his elbow back together. But I heard from a close source that both he and Mom (his mom) took it wonderfully, with only a minimal amount of crying on both of their parts. :) If you are reading this Laura, I commend you. You are a wonderful mom.
ANYWAY... back to our wonderful rare spring day in the beginning of January in this temperate climate.... We walked to Markieloaf's house, only to find the he wasn't home. Pinned little arm, and all, he must have been out shopping. Maybe he got stir crazy! :) So, we decided that a little excercise in the fresh air would do us good, and we snuck inside their house to find some gardening tools. (thier front door is usually open). All I could find was a hammer, and a rubber glove, but these served well enough for us to help them pull the little pricker weeds out of their front landscaping. At least the obvious stuff as you are going up the front walk. Savannah, Jaidyn, and I had fun pulling them out, dumping them in their trash can, and then sweeping their walk for them with a broom that I found in their laundry room. I hope they don't mind the dirt we left on their broom, and in the claw of their hammer! We left as much dirt as we could in their landscaping. :)
While digging out the weeds, I found a SAM! This is Jaidyn speak for a WORM. She and Savannah transported it to our house in the stroller's cupholder, with enough wet dirt for it to enjoy on the way. They then stayed outside digging in the dirt for more sams for quite a while. The warm weather attracted all the kids outside eventually to lay on the deck in a pile of blankets and pillows. They took turns serving each other the cut up apples and peanut butter sandwiches I made for them (well, to give credit where credit is due, Travis actually finished making the sanwiches by putting on the jelly). They were each the servant or the royalty getting served at one time or another. What a beautiful thing to watch my children play together.
Well, I am getting tired now, and I want to reserve my energy for the week. I'll have to blog later. But quickly before I go... for recording purposes, I'd like to mention that we worked on geometry this week. Jesse, Travis, Savannah, and I sat around the kitchen table with Jesse's 6th grade textbook, playing with angles and 3D shapes, measuring, drawing, and discussing the angles of rollercoasters and rooflines, and how many faces an object had. Travis drew a triangle, and Jesse a cylinder. They needed no help, they drew them quite naturally. Drawing 3D has always been difficult for me... maybe I'll learn now! :)
Oh yes! Jaidyn is learning her numbers! She loves to call Markiloaf all the time, at least once a day, and she has his phone number partially memorized, and can pick out some of the numbers. She asked me to write down some phone numbers the other day so that she could see what they looked like. She wanted Markie's, Bella Roses', Grandpa and Grandma Schooling's, Aunt Nonan's, Grandma Frase's, and Grandpa Hach's.... What a thrill to see your child seeking an education from you! She's been able to count to 10 and higher for quite some time now, and she can sing her ABC's. I am looking forward to when she starts pointing out letters and naming them.
Maybe I'll get out the spell and say that Aaron learned his letters on at 4 years old. :) He is reading short phrases now.
Ok, bed time. Good night.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
