Tonight, Jaidyn, Aaron, and I were the only ones home for a little while. Jaidyn's favorite book right now is "Richard Scarry's Cars, and Trucks, and Things that Go". She has suddenly become very interested in reading books in the last few months.
Anyway, this book has a little goldbug on every page that you have to find. He hides really well. She calls him "bee". I'll turn the page, and she says, "Where bee?" And when she finds him it's "There sis!" Translated means, "there he is!" :)
So, we were finding bee, and Aaron wanted me to read what the pages said, instead of just finding the goldbug. So I started reading. And then he tells me, "I know what that says..." What? I asked. "Mustard" he says. Now I'm not sure at this point whether he has memorized this, although I don't remember reading that part because it was part of a big glob of words we don't usually read.... or if he just thought it looked like a mustard truck because it was yellow... but it's not at all shaped like a mustard bottle, so it could have been a yellow tube of toothpaste...
So, I asked him, "How do you know that, Aaron?" He says, "I read it!" I am excited, but still skeptical. So, I pick out some words, and say, "so what does this say?" He tries to guess by what it's a picture of, but I tell him, "No, you have to sound out the letters." So we go through a couple of words. He knows the S, T, E, L, and A sounds really well. I had to help him with some blends like OY, OU, and SH, and some sight words like THE and THEY. But on the whole, he started sounding out words like LAST, FOR, TIGGER, IS, and even TIME! I was blown away. My son has never been to any kind of preschool, traditional school, or even been in a homeschool curriculum!! Yet he is reading!! And I would bet money that within 6 months (or a lot less) I will be blogging that he is reading books on his own! Real life learning really does work!! You DO NOT need textbooks! Just an interest in learning, (Aaron's part) and a willing helper (that would be me most of the time). What a privilege to be a parent, and observe this phenomenom!!
I had to add to this post after I looked through our pictures last night. I'll try to add a pic to this post too. When we took the kids to the Kalahari Resort and Waterpark for Christmas this year, one of the things we did was play a few games of Candy Bingo. The kids had bingo boards that had the name of a candy in each square. They used sweet tarts for markers. Aaron had his own board, and I sat by him thinking I'd help him read. But he didn't need as much help as I thought he would! Whenever the lady doing the game called out the name of the candy, he listened to the first sound of the words, and found the right square! It was so cool!
Saturday, November 25, 2006
Monday, November 13, 2006
An expert's article on kids learning at play
When is Playing Not Playing?
(No, It’s Not a Trick Question)
By Dana Johnson
“There is a tremendous hunger in our culture for true play,” says Dr. Stuart L. Brown, an M.D. who has spent years studying play in children. He is among a growing number of doctors, psychologists, child development specialists and other professionals who are speaking out on the apparent lack of true play in children today.
Are they right? Are our children starving for play?
What exactly is play?
To be defined as play, most researchers agree that children’s activities must meet five criteria:
Play must be pleasurable and enjoyable.
It must be spontaneous and voluntary.
A play activity contains an aspect of make-believe.
The player must be actively engaged in play.
Play must have no extrinsic goals.
While most children probably engage in play activities that meet some of these criteria, an activity has to meet all five to be considered “true” play. Activities for children today seem to be lacking in two primary areas: “The player must be actively engaged in play,” and “Play must have no extrinsic goals.”
Today’s passive entertainment
Many toys on the market today encourage passive rather than active play. In this age of high-tech toys, children frequently push a button and are entertained by watching play happen. The construction of the toy sets up the play activity and determines how it will be played with. The same can be said for many other typical activities for children today -- television, movies, computer and video games. The problem with these activities is that the child is not creating anything using his own imagination. The child is not an active participant in creation of the play experience.
Our criteria above state that play must happen for the sake of play, with any outside goals. Much of what we “play” with children today has the covert agenda of teaching them a skill. Many of today’s toys are “educational,” and clever marketing has told parents that they need to stimulate their baby’s brain, use flash cards with their toddler, teach reading to their preschooler. Some of today’s most popular toys carry names such as Einstein, Genius, Mozart and Scholar.
While there is nothing wrong with children learning through play, the point is that learning happens naturally in the course of true play. All children are born with a desire to explore, discover and learn. The most effective means of accomplishing this is through their play. When playing with water, children learn about weight. In selling food in a pretend store, they learn about numbers. By using toys symbolically, they are thinking abstractly -- a requirement for reading. All of these activities lay the groundwork for learning naturally.
The pressure is on
It is interesting to note that although children appear to be lacking in true play experiences, most parents agree that play is important to their children’s development. In fact, research has shown that parents even know the types of play that are most beneficial to children!
If parents acknowledge that play is important and know what types of play are beneficial, then why are children not playing in this type unstructured free play? Developmental psychologists Roberta Michnick Golinkoff, Ph.D., and Kathy Hirsh-Pasek, Ph.D., say that as parents, “we know what to do, but we just can’t bring ourselves to do it. We are afraid that if we trust our instincts, our children will be missing out on learning some critical skills.” Their book Einstein Never Used Flash Cards proves otherwise.
Taking back the right to play
It is my hope that those of us who consider ourselves to be natural parents will take the lead in bringing back true play to childhood. Just as many of us take back the process of childbirth, just as we trust our instincts regarding attachment, let us also value our children’s need to play creatively and show respect for the importance of play in their lives.
Play fosters the growth of healthy children in every aspect of development – physically, cognitively, socially and emotionally. It really is food for children’s bodies, minds and spirits. Let us nourish them with wonderful “true” play experiences.
References:
Kathy Hirsh-Pasek, Ph.D. and Roberta Michnick Golinkoff, Ph.D., with Diane Eyer, Ph.D.: Einstein Never Used Flash Cards (Rodale, 2003)
© Dana Johnson
Dana Johnson is a former children's play therapist and holds a master's degree in social work. She is the owner of Three Sisters Toys, specializing in natural play materials for children.
(No, It’s Not a Trick Question)
By Dana Johnson
“There is a tremendous hunger in our culture for true play,” says Dr. Stuart L. Brown, an M.D. who has spent years studying play in children. He is among a growing number of doctors, psychologists, child development specialists and other professionals who are speaking out on the apparent lack of true play in children today.
Are they right? Are our children starving for play?
What exactly is play?
To be defined as play, most researchers agree that children’s activities must meet five criteria:
Play must be pleasurable and enjoyable.
It must be spontaneous and voluntary.
A play activity contains an aspect of make-believe.
The player must be actively engaged in play.
Play must have no extrinsic goals.
While most children probably engage in play activities that meet some of these criteria, an activity has to meet all five to be considered “true” play. Activities for children today seem to be lacking in two primary areas: “The player must be actively engaged in play,” and “Play must have no extrinsic goals.”
Today’s passive entertainment
Many toys on the market today encourage passive rather than active play. In this age of high-tech toys, children frequently push a button and are entertained by watching play happen. The construction of the toy sets up the play activity and determines how it will be played with. The same can be said for many other typical activities for children today -- television, movies, computer and video games. The problem with these activities is that the child is not creating anything using his own imagination. The child is not an active participant in creation of the play experience.
Our criteria above state that play must happen for the sake of play, with any outside goals. Much of what we “play” with children today has the covert agenda of teaching them a skill. Many of today’s toys are “educational,” and clever marketing has told parents that they need to stimulate their baby’s brain, use flash cards with their toddler, teach reading to their preschooler. Some of today’s most popular toys carry names such as Einstein, Genius, Mozart and Scholar.
While there is nothing wrong with children learning through play, the point is that learning happens naturally in the course of true play. All children are born with a desire to explore, discover and learn. The most effective means of accomplishing this is through their play. When playing with water, children learn about weight. In selling food in a pretend store, they learn about numbers. By using toys symbolically, they are thinking abstractly -- a requirement for reading. All of these activities lay the groundwork for learning naturally.
The pressure is on
It is interesting to note that although children appear to be lacking in true play experiences, most parents agree that play is important to their children’s development. In fact, research has shown that parents even know the types of play that are most beneficial to children!
If parents acknowledge that play is important and know what types of play are beneficial, then why are children not playing in this type unstructured free play? Developmental psychologists Roberta Michnick Golinkoff, Ph.D., and Kathy Hirsh-Pasek, Ph.D., say that as parents, “we know what to do, but we just can’t bring ourselves to do it. We are afraid that if we trust our instincts, our children will be missing out on learning some critical skills.” Their book Einstein Never Used Flash Cards proves otherwise.
Taking back the right to play
It is my hope that those of us who consider ourselves to be natural parents will take the lead in bringing back true play to childhood. Just as many of us take back the process of childbirth, just as we trust our instincts regarding attachment, let us also value our children’s need to play creatively and show respect for the importance of play in their lives.
Play fosters the growth of healthy children in every aspect of development – physically, cognitively, socially and emotionally. It really is food for children’s bodies, minds and spirits. Let us nourish them with wonderful “true” play experiences.
References:
Kathy Hirsh-Pasek, Ph.D. and Roberta Michnick Golinkoff, Ph.D., with Diane Eyer, Ph.D.: Einstein Never Used Flash Cards (Rodale, 2003)
© Dana Johnson
Dana Johnson is a former children's play therapist and holds a master's degree in social work. She is the owner of Three Sisters Toys, specializing in natural play materials for children.
Smart kids
Today I had a chance to discuss unschooling with someone, and they brought up a point again that I have had other people say to me. Some people tend to think, when they hear all of the 'educational' things my kids do, that they must do these things because they are smart. I've had family and total strangers make this observation.
First off, I would like to say, Yes! I think my kids are smart! :)
BUT. capital B, capital U, capital T.... they do not do all these educational things JUST because they are smart kids! I sincerely believe it is because they have had the freedom to think for themselves. I do not push them to come up with all the things that they do. Their uncle introduced them to the HeroClix game that provides a lot of their superior Math skills. Their drive as young boys provides them with the desire to play this game because it's about playing war with super heroes! I just sit back and watch! This passion has lasted for a good 3 or 4 months now. The boys know that I am happy that it teaches them Math skills, but they are not against it, because it is fun for them, and I don't say, "OK, boys! Time to learn your math! Go get out the HeroClix!" I sincerely believe that if I did that, they would tire quickly of the game, because it wouldn't be their choice when to do it. It would become "schoolwork".
Their passion before HeroClix was the Pokemon card game. It too was a game that provided Math skills, and logic skills, not to mention great reading skills! I sat back and watched them enjoy themselves and learn all at the same time.
Neopets online is the kids latest passion. They all have their own, and the older boys even get online themselves to do it. (after they've ok'd it with me). I get online with Savannah and Aaron to help them with theirs. This is another game that teaches a lot through fun. Reading, economics, math, and so much more. They have to get online every so often to feed their neopets to keep them alive, and then they have opportunity to play games, one of which is figuring out anagrams, to get money to buy things for thier neopets.. Hence the economics (how much do I have, and how much do I want to spend on a given object), and the Math, (now I have to figure out how much I can afford).
Kids learn sooo much through play. See my next post for an article from a "professional with a degree" on this subject! :)
Anyway, back to the original subject. ALL KIDS ARE SMART! Kids just have different interests at different times in their lives. We all know that eveyone is different. So, why do we think that everyone should follow the same curriculum at the same time in their lives? Why can't a child follow the lead of his interests, and be allowed to naturally soak in the "educational" stuff that way? Isn't that how they learned to walk and talk? Did we make them take classes (or go to therapy) if they didn't walk or talk by a certain age?
My kids ARE smart. But a lot of the learning they have done takes place because they are interested in it at the time. It does NOT require a certain type of kid to unschool. It just takes a parent who is willing to have faith in our natural ability as humans to learn, to take the time out of their day to share their experience and knowledge with their kids, and to be humble enough and willing to look things up if they don't know the answer. I like how someone put it... "trying to teach a parent how to teach their kid (homeschool them), is like trying to teach a fish to swim - not much training required."
So please. Don't think that your kid has to be "smart" to homeschool! Although in fact, your kid IS smart! He/she has a God-given natural ability to learn. It's just that after so many years of being forced to learn things that aren't right for them at the time, or even a short period of being forced for some kids, they lose interest in "learning". It has become a drudgery.
Or the fact could be that your child may not be ready for a certain area that you are desiring them to learn in. Maybe just give them the time to mature, like you did when they were a baby, and didn't have as many teeth as some other kids their age. You just waited and trusted that they would eventually get their teeth. The other people's kid wasn't "smarter" because he got his first. Or walked first, or talked first, or recognized people first, or waved Hi first, etc, etc, etc...
You just knew that each kid developes at their own rate, and didn't get worried or upset about it. Reclaim that ability. Don't listen to the "experts" who say that your child is "behind" if they don't know a certain thing at the same time "the majority" does. Just relax. Enjoy life with your kids, and be amazed at how smart they are in what they do now!
First off, I would like to say, Yes! I think my kids are smart! :)
BUT. capital B, capital U, capital T.... they do not do all these educational things JUST because they are smart kids! I sincerely believe it is because they have had the freedom to think for themselves. I do not push them to come up with all the things that they do. Their uncle introduced them to the HeroClix game that provides a lot of their superior Math skills. Their drive as young boys provides them with the desire to play this game because it's about playing war with super heroes! I just sit back and watch! This passion has lasted for a good 3 or 4 months now. The boys know that I am happy that it teaches them Math skills, but they are not against it, because it is fun for them, and I don't say, "OK, boys! Time to learn your math! Go get out the HeroClix!" I sincerely believe that if I did that, they would tire quickly of the game, because it wouldn't be their choice when to do it. It would become "schoolwork".
Their passion before HeroClix was the Pokemon card game. It too was a game that provided Math skills, and logic skills, not to mention great reading skills! I sat back and watched them enjoy themselves and learn all at the same time.
Neopets online is the kids latest passion. They all have their own, and the older boys even get online themselves to do it. (after they've ok'd it with me). I get online with Savannah and Aaron to help them with theirs. This is another game that teaches a lot through fun. Reading, economics, math, and so much more. They have to get online every so often to feed their neopets to keep them alive, and then they have opportunity to play games, one of which is figuring out anagrams, to get money to buy things for thier neopets.. Hence the economics (how much do I have, and how much do I want to spend on a given object), and the Math, (now I have to figure out how much I can afford).
Kids learn sooo much through play. See my next post for an article from a "professional with a degree" on this subject! :)
Anyway, back to the original subject. ALL KIDS ARE SMART! Kids just have different interests at different times in their lives. We all know that eveyone is different. So, why do we think that everyone should follow the same curriculum at the same time in their lives? Why can't a child follow the lead of his interests, and be allowed to naturally soak in the "educational" stuff that way? Isn't that how they learned to walk and talk? Did we make them take classes (or go to therapy) if they didn't walk or talk by a certain age?
My kids ARE smart. But a lot of the learning they have done takes place because they are interested in it at the time. It does NOT require a certain type of kid to unschool. It just takes a parent who is willing to have faith in our natural ability as humans to learn, to take the time out of their day to share their experience and knowledge with their kids, and to be humble enough and willing to look things up if they don't know the answer. I like how someone put it... "trying to teach a parent how to teach their kid (homeschool them), is like trying to teach a fish to swim - not much training required."
So please. Don't think that your kid has to be "smart" to homeschool! Although in fact, your kid IS smart! He/she has a God-given natural ability to learn. It's just that after so many years of being forced to learn things that aren't right for them at the time, or even a short period of being forced for some kids, they lose interest in "learning". It has become a drudgery.
Or the fact could be that your child may not be ready for a certain area that you are desiring them to learn in. Maybe just give them the time to mature, like you did when they were a baby, and didn't have as many teeth as some other kids their age. You just waited and trusted that they would eventually get their teeth. The other people's kid wasn't "smarter" because he got his first. Or walked first, or talked first, or recognized people first, or waved Hi first, etc, etc, etc...
You just knew that each kid developes at their own rate, and didn't get worried or upset about it. Reclaim that ability. Don't listen to the "experts" who say that your child is "behind" if they don't know a certain thing at the same time "the majority" does. Just relax. Enjoy life with your kids, and be amazed at how smart they are in what they do now!
Monday, November 06, 2006
I'm still learning.....
Recently it has been brought to my attention that my posts may come off as demeaning to some people.
I looked through and thought over my posts, and I have to admit that it could appear demeaning to other methods of education and parenting, if you did not know where I am coming from.
Please let me apologize if you have been offended by my blog in any way. I do not mean to offend people. I have a tendency to get over zealous when I discover something that is exciting to me, and tend to "preach" it to others.... sometimes to others who aren't really into it.
So, I just wanted to post again, saying that if you find my blog offensive, please try to look at it as my excitement maybe coming across a little too brashly. I have a tendency as well to worry that I need to convince others that what I am doing is "right" or "ok". I'm working on getting rid of that, and hopefully, with the ridding of it, I will also rid myself of coming across offensively at times.
Thank you for understanding that I am still learning too.
Michelle
I looked through and thought over my posts, and I have to admit that it could appear demeaning to other methods of education and parenting, if you did not know where I am coming from.
Please let me apologize if you have been offended by my blog in any way. I do not mean to offend people. I have a tendency to get over zealous when I discover something that is exciting to me, and tend to "preach" it to others.... sometimes to others who aren't really into it.
So, I just wanted to post again, saying that if you find my blog offensive, please try to look at it as my excitement maybe coming across a little too brashly. I have a tendency as well to worry that I need to convince others that what I am doing is "right" or "ok". I'm working on getting rid of that, and hopefully, with the ridding of it, I will also rid myself of coming across offensively at times.
Thank you for understanding that I am still learning too.
Michelle
Friday, November 03, 2006
More Real Life Math / Parenting
Today was the day that we sweep our carpets... When we use the Rainbow sweeper instead of just the little handheld vacuum, we usually rake them as well. Yes, that's right - rake them. It's actually a professional carpet cleaners rake that they recommend you use before sweeping to bring up dirt from the bottom of the fibers, and prolong the life of your carpet. But that's more along the lines of science, not math, so I'll get off that subject. :)
Travis we have long said is going to be a lawyer. He loves to argue his point when he thinks he is right. So, when we laid out the plans for who was going to sweep and rake what rooms, he had a problem. The 2 rooms that Jesse had to sweep had to be not as much work as he (Travis) had to do, since he had to rake and sweep 4 rooms, plus the hallway upstairs. It just wasn't fair that Jesse age 10, only had those 2 rooms, and Travis, age 8, had 4 rooms and a hallway.
I tried to explain to him that the square footage for Jesse was more, since he had the 2 largest rooms in the house. I used the example of how 20 pennies usually looks like a lot more than just 1 quarter to a kid who doesn't understand the value of money yet. He didn't understand, so, I said, "Ok, Travis, do you want us to prove it out mathematically?" He said yes.
So, out came the pencil and paper, and the measuring tape. He measured the hallway alone, and he and Jesse began measuring my bedroom. He measured it in inches with my sewing measuring tape, so we had to convert to feet, which required some long division that he's never done before. I didn't let Jesse help with that, since he already knows how to do it. Travis and I worked it out, and before we even finished doing all the A = L x W, to find the square footage of all the rooms, Travis started seeing how Jesse really did have more work and didn't want to finish doing all the calculations. Which was fine with me. I am not going to make learning long division all at one shot a "have to" thing. I think he'll get it easier if it's in smaller, digestable bits, rather than forcing something down his throat that's too big to swallow at his age.
I don't know if I blogged this before, but I've read articles,that state that before age 10, if you try to make a kid learn Math that's more complicated than simple calculations that can be done in the head, you'll actually mess him up. We aren't hard wired to learn that stuff properly before age 10. Kind of like we aren't mature enough to handle some information, until we reach a certain age...
You don't go telling a 5 year old that he has to do 10 x 12 in his head, right? The article stated that you store math info differently before age 10 than after. It's like a computer putting it in the wrong file before age 10, and then after age 10, not being able to find it.
Anyway, long story short, we found another way to learn Geometry and long division, and lots of multiplication and adding, in real life within days of the last time.
I do want to note something else as well. Some people think that unschooling parents just leave their children to themselves, and don't bother to "teach" them anything.... Let me ask you, how many parents of kids who have to do schoolwork every day, would still have the energy or desire take the time to go through all that measuring and calculation? How many would just say, "Hey! Listen! I'm telling you, the 2 bigger rooms are more work! Now GO DO IT!!!" In my opinion, I not only taught Travis some Math, but I also taught him that I value him enough to allow him to try to prove his point. It was not an angry exchange of emotions, it was simply a logical exchange of ideas between two people.
I am not in any way generalizing all "school" type parents as bad parents... I am trying to say that Unschooling is NOT Unparenting.
Travis we have long said is going to be a lawyer. He loves to argue his point when he thinks he is right. So, when we laid out the plans for who was going to sweep and rake what rooms, he had a problem. The 2 rooms that Jesse had to sweep had to be not as much work as he (Travis) had to do, since he had to rake and sweep 4 rooms, plus the hallway upstairs. It just wasn't fair that Jesse age 10, only had those 2 rooms, and Travis, age 8, had 4 rooms and a hallway.
I tried to explain to him that the square footage for Jesse was more, since he had the 2 largest rooms in the house. I used the example of how 20 pennies usually looks like a lot more than just 1 quarter to a kid who doesn't understand the value of money yet. He didn't understand, so, I said, "Ok, Travis, do you want us to prove it out mathematically?" He said yes.
So, out came the pencil and paper, and the measuring tape. He measured the hallway alone, and he and Jesse began measuring my bedroom. He measured it in inches with my sewing measuring tape, so we had to convert to feet, which required some long division that he's never done before. I didn't let Jesse help with that, since he already knows how to do it. Travis and I worked it out, and before we even finished doing all the A = L x W, to find the square footage of all the rooms, Travis started seeing how Jesse really did have more work and didn't want to finish doing all the calculations. Which was fine with me. I am not going to make learning long division all at one shot a "have to" thing. I think he'll get it easier if it's in smaller, digestable bits, rather than forcing something down his throat that's too big to swallow at his age.
I don't know if I blogged this before, but I've read articles,that state that before age 10, if you try to make a kid learn Math that's more complicated than simple calculations that can be done in the head, you'll actually mess him up. We aren't hard wired to learn that stuff properly before age 10. Kind of like we aren't mature enough to handle some information, until we reach a certain age...
You don't go telling a 5 year old that he has to do 10 x 12 in his head, right? The article stated that you store math info differently before age 10 than after. It's like a computer putting it in the wrong file before age 10, and then after age 10, not being able to find it.
Anyway, long story short, we found another way to learn Geometry and long division, and lots of multiplication and adding, in real life within days of the last time.
I do want to note something else as well. Some people think that unschooling parents just leave their children to themselves, and don't bother to "teach" them anything.... Let me ask you, how many parents of kids who have to do schoolwork every day, would still have the energy or desire take the time to go through all that measuring and calculation? How many would just say, "Hey! Listen! I'm telling you, the 2 bigger rooms are more work! Now GO DO IT!!!" In my opinion, I not only taught Travis some Math, but I also taught him that I value him enough to allow him to try to prove his point. It was not an angry exchange of emotions, it was simply a logical exchange of ideas between two people.
I am not in any way generalizing all "school" type parents as bad parents... I am trying to say that Unschooling is NOT Unparenting.
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
Aaron's self taught alphabet - Age 4
About a year ago, I bought a little Learning LeapPad for $3 at a used clothing store. It has alphabet shaped letters that you push that will tell you what the letter is, what sound it can make, and also a how to spell 3 letter word functions.
Aaron began learning to recognize his letters with that over the last year, and since then, he has learned to write his name (which was a shock to me, he just up and wrote it one day!), and write all the names in our family. Basically, he writes the whole alphabet. And he knows a good portion of the sounds of the alphabet. This has NOT, I REPEAT, HAS NOT!! come about through me daily teaching him through a workbook. A few times, he has messed around with a workbook, or we have read maybe 2 times out of a "Reading Handbook", but the bulk of his learning has come just through daily living, and a desire to learn. He began by asking how to spell things... grass, car, house, road, rock, etc... That was at about age 4 and a half, after he'd been playing with the leap pad for a good couple of months. He would even want to take it on car trips for something fun to do! Also, I would point out how to read simple words, like "hex nut" at the hardware store, to keep him from getting bored while we waited for the guy to find the right part for us.
He has since graduated to writing strings of letters on a piece of paper the way I remember the other kids doing. Then he asks me what it says. I try to sound it out, and he asks... does it say anything? I ask him, Does it sound like a word? He admits that it does not, and I tell him he's doing a great job writing his letters, and Here, why doesn't he write this simple 3 letter word? So, he does, and I sound it out for him. Then he goes back to whatever he was doing.
Today, he was sitting at the table with my MIL and I while we were talking, writing his strings of letters... SMUVWSNM..... I looked over and said, Hey, Aaron, will you do me a favor? Will you sing the alphabet song in your head, and write the letters in order, instead of just all different kinds of letters? I want to see if you can write the alphabet.
So, he did! I probably helped him remember how 5 out of the 26 letters were formed. But his penmanship is just beautiful! :) I was so proud. Afterward, he sat and sang the song to himself as he pointed to each of his letters. I had him write his name and age at the bottom, and explained how to write the word AGE and what it meant. I think he was proud of himself too, by the shy smile on his face! :)
It's a bittersweet thing, this watching your child grow up. But a beautiful one to witness! Especially when you see how contrary to most of society's beliefs, learning to read can be self taught! It really isn't so hard after all, and it doesn't need to be a forced thing!
Recently I got a Reader Rabbit "learning how to read" lab kit from the library. I will probably see if he is interested in that. If not, then I'll get the leappad back out, and see if he wants to do the 3 letter words again... I know he'd be much more ready for that now. My point will not be, "here, Aaron, you HAVE to learn to read.. let's do this or that to accomplish that task". And, I will not attempt to get him to "learn" something every day about reading. It will be more of an attitude of, "Hey, I know you are going to learn eventually, and now that you seem interested, here's a multitude of choices to have fun with! And then you'll be able to read just like other bigger people!" (The fact that he will be able to read actually excites him!- his desire to learn has never been squelched by long periods of forced "learning") I will continue to read to him, and help him sound out signs in public that he asks me too, and stuff like that. It will be a life lived journey to reading, and I know we'll enjoy every step of the way!
Aaron began learning to recognize his letters with that over the last year, and since then, he has learned to write his name (which was a shock to me, he just up and wrote it one day!), and write all the names in our family. Basically, he writes the whole alphabet. And he knows a good portion of the sounds of the alphabet. This has NOT, I REPEAT, HAS NOT!! come about through me daily teaching him through a workbook. A few times, he has messed around with a workbook, or we have read maybe 2 times out of a "Reading Handbook", but the bulk of his learning has come just through daily living, and a desire to learn. He began by asking how to spell things... grass, car, house, road, rock, etc... That was at about age 4 and a half, after he'd been playing with the leap pad for a good couple of months. He would even want to take it on car trips for something fun to do! Also, I would point out how to read simple words, like "hex nut" at the hardware store, to keep him from getting bored while we waited for the guy to find the right part for us.
He has since graduated to writing strings of letters on a piece of paper the way I remember the other kids doing. Then he asks me what it says. I try to sound it out, and he asks... does it say anything? I ask him, Does it sound like a word? He admits that it does not, and I tell him he's doing a great job writing his letters, and Here, why doesn't he write this simple 3 letter word? So, he does, and I sound it out for him. Then he goes back to whatever he was doing.
Today, he was sitting at the table with my MIL and I while we were talking, writing his strings of letters... SMUVWSNM..... I looked over and said, Hey, Aaron, will you do me a favor? Will you sing the alphabet song in your head, and write the letters in order, instead of just all different kinds of letters? I want to see if you can write the alphabet.
So, he did! I probably helped him remember how 5 out of the 26 letters were formed. But his penmanship is just beautiful! :) I was so proud. Afterward, he sat and sang the song to himself as he pointed to each of his letters. I had him write his name and age at the bottom, and explained how to write the word AGE and what it meant. I think he was proud of himself too, by the shy smile on his face! :)
It's a bittersweet thing, this watching your child grow up. But a beautiful one to witness! Especially when you see how contrary to most of society's beliefs, learning to read can be self taught! It really isn't so hard after all, and it doesn't need to be a forced thing!
Recently I got a Reader Rabbit "learning how to read" lab kit from the library. I will probably see if he is interested in that. If not, then I'll get the leappad back out, and see if he wants to do the 3 letter words again... I know he'd be much more ready for that now. My point will not be, "here, Aaron, you HAVE to learn to read.. let's do this or that to accomplish that task". And, I will not attempt to get him to "learn" something every day about reading. It will be more of an attitude of, "Hey, I know you are going to learn eventually, and now that you seem interested, here's a multitude of choices to have fun with! And then you'll be able to read just like other bigger people!" (The fact that he will be able to read actually excites him!- his desire to learn has never been squelched by long periods of forced "learning") I will continue to read to him, and help him sound out signs in public that he asks me too, and stuff like that. It will be a life lived journey to reading, and I know we'll enjoy every step of the way!
Real Life Math
I wanted to write about some things that the kids have been up to lately. Just to record for myself and to give more examples of learning through living to people who need them...
Last week, I got real ambitious, and the kids and I cleaned out our ENTIRE basement. And believe me, it was to the point where you could hardly see the floor for all the trash and toys strewn around. Part of the reason we did this was to put foam flooring down. They are in these 2' by 2' squares that have interlocking edges, and are made for kids specifically. Our basement concrete floor was getting very slippery in some places, and was dangerous. So, we needed a safer floor.
Part of the process of getting new flooring was to figure out how to cover it. Did we want carpeting? Yes, that'd be nice... but how much would it cost? How long would it last? What color should it be, and most importantly again, How much would it cost? :)
Part of home or un-schooling your kids, is sharing life with them. Keeping the mindset that each and every experience is and/or can be educational. So instead of doing all the research and math myself, I had the kids gather around the computer, and we looked at styles and colors of carpet that Lowe's had on their website. Then I called Lowe's to find out pricing. The kids sat there (talking amoungst themselves quietly) while I was on the phone, then listened after I hung up to how much per square foot the carpet was, and how long it would last, etc... Then we all went to the basement to measure, and figure pricing. We measured the area with a measuring tape, and then sat down with a paper and pencil and figured up the area, and the cost for the area. I first accidentally showed them the formula for perimeter, P = 2L + 2W and realized my mistake when the number didn't match up with what the Lowe's guy had told me. This "mistake", however, gave me the opportunity to show them two geometry formulas instead of just one. So, we refigured with the area formula, A = L x W.
We had to figure for 3 rectangles, actually, because of the one wall that juts out 2 feet in the middle. So, needless to say, they got a LOT of math in, in their heads, and on paper. No calculator. It was mainly my 8 and 10 year olds that did this.
My sister in law asked me, "How did you remember those formulas?! I would have had to look them up on the internet!"
I did! I replied. Some formulas I remembered and others I didn't... You just have to re-learn with your kids.
After we figured up the carpet pricing, one of my sons came up with the idea of just using the foam squares, since we already had some down as protection underneath our gymnastic ropes. This led to more figuring of how many squares we would need, how many are in a package, and finally how much each package costs, and total price.
It turned out that the foam squares were actually about half the cost of a very cheap, short lived carpet. (And you can use a broom to sweep instead of hauling the sweeper downstairs!)
My sons had no qualms about doing "Math". They no longer associate "Math" with boring figures in a textbook. They associate it with life. Doing something for a purpose.
Another example of that would be just the other day in the truck on the way home from the Jungle Book play. I was sitting outside the OLD NAVY store with Savannah, my 6 year old, Aaron my 4 year old, and Jaidyn, my 2 year old (who was asleep). My 28 week pregnant body hurt too bad to go back into another store, especially with Jaidyn asleep for her nap, so I parked by the doors, and let my 8 and 10 year old boys go in to exchange their new jeans for a size bigger by themselves.
SIDE NOTE: This would be considered real world experience, and socializing with people not their own age. :)
So, anyway, Savannah and I were talking, while we waited, about how many weeks until some event that is coming up.. I can't remember what it was, but we were saying it'd be 6 weeks yet. She wanted to know how many days that was, so I told her that there are 7 days in a week, and there'd be 6 of those. She began counting this up on her fingers, but this became too hard quickly, and I introduced her to the cool concept of multiplication. Instead of doing all that adding, just memorize the fact that 6 weeks times 7 days in a week means 42 days. She wanted to know how many days there were (that was her motivation for learning). It wasn't because her schoolbook said that she must learn that 6 times 7 equals 42. It was not an abstract fact, but a concrete one attached to an idea. Real life.
Just as we were finishing this discussion, the boys hopped back in the truck, and overheard the Math quizzing. This lead to me quizzing them on the higher multiplication tables all the way home. Every once in a while they love for me to quiz them on their "times tables" although they don't associate them with that dreaded school term. Travis got 11 x 12 = 132 even before Jesse did! We had a good time with it. We laughed out loud when I told Jesse, "and it's not 12 de 12"... about the answer to the 11 x 12 problem. (This was right after I'd explained how 11's were pretty easy. 3 x 11 = 33 (3rd de 3), and 4 x 11 = 44 (4 de 4)... Get it?" It was funny to us anyway. :)
Another example of real life Math (not to mention free thought, creativity, and dedication to finishing a self-appointed task), would be the new game my boys came up with the same day we figured up the basement flooring. They were all excited about getting all the foam squares, and ran upstairs while I was talking with my MIL and playing with the younger 3 children.
After a while, they came downstairs telling us about this new game they had come up with. They called it Human Clix. It's their variation of the Hero Clix game that they play with comic book characters on a paper map. Basically, they themselves are the characters in their game, and they play it on the foam squares as a gameboard.. sort of like chess.
They actually sat down for hours (spread out over a couple of days), and came up with multiple character identities and abilities. Each ability having a numerical value assigned to it, so you can figure out who is beating who after one attacks the other. They came up with some of their character's identities based on the super-hero's they had made up for themselves, their siblings, their cousins, and their friends a few months ago, which is another post in itself. Travis, my 8 year old, had this piece of yellow construction paper covered in columns of numbers! They were the numerical ablilities and attacks. I wouldn't dare try to explain it, because I don't understand it completely myself! :) LOL.. but they DO! And they have been playing the game with our 15 year old neighbor, Brandon, who has suddenly been interested in hanging out with the boys again. We took him and his sister Leah to a few things with us recently. Some horseback riding, and a play of the Legends of Sleepy Hollow.
It's like our prodigal surrogate children have come home... :) I enjoy having them as part of our children's lives.
Sorry, I got off the Math subject there... but anyway, there are 3 prime examples of how you CAN learn Math in real life without a textbook.
Oh yeah! I daresay that Jesse probably observed Math in action when he went to work building a 12 x 16 barn foundation with his Uncle Tim last week! Construction is defenitely a real life use of Math...
He worked for about 9 hours in 30 to 40 degree weather, and I'm sure he used Math again when they went directly after work to the comic book shop to spend the $13 Uncle Tim paid him! :)
Last week, I got real ambitious, and the kids and I cleaned out our ENTIRE basement. And believe me, it was to the point where you could hardly see the floor for all the trash and toys strewn around. Part of the reason we did this was to put foam flooring down. They are in these 2' by 2' squares that have interlocking edges, and are made for kids specifically. Our basement concrete floor was getting very slippery in some places, and was dangerous. So, we needed a safer floor.
Part of the process of getting new flooring was to figure out how to cover it. Did we want carpeting? Yes, that'd be nice... but how much would it cost? How long would it last? What color should it be, and most importantly again, How much would it cost? :)
Part of home or un-schooling your kids, is sharing life with them. Keeping the mindset that each and every experience is and/or can be educational. So instead of doing all the research and math myself, I had the kids gather around the computer, and we looked at styles and colors of carpet that Lowe's had on their website. Then I called Lowe's to find out pricing. The kids sat there (talking amoungst themselves quietly) while I was on the phone, then listened after I hung up to how much per square foot the carpet was, and how long it would last, etc... Then we all went to the basement to measure, and figure pricing. We measured the area with a measuring tape, and then sat down with a paper and pencil and figured up the area, and the cost for the area. I first accidentally showed them the formula for perimeter, P = 2L + 2W and realized my mistake when the number didn't match up with what the Lowe's guy had told me. This "mistake", however, gave me the opportunity to show them two geometry formulas instead of just one. So, we refigured with the area formula, A = L x W.
We had to figure for 3 rectangles, actually, because of the one wall that juts out 2 feet in the middle. So, needless to say, they got a LOT of math in, in their heads, and on paper. No calculator. It was mainly my 8 and 10 year olds that did this.
My sister in law asked me, "How did you remember those formulas?! I would have had to look them up on the internet!"
I did! I replied. Some formulas I remembered and others I didn't... You just have to re-learn with your kids.
After we figured up the carpet pricing, one of my sons came up with the idea of just using the foam squares, since we already had some down as protection underneath our gymnastic ropes. This led to more figuring of how many squares we would need, how many are in a package, and finally how much each package costs, and total price.
It turned out that the foam squares were actually about half the cost of a very cheap, short lived carpet. (And you can use a broom to sweep instead of hauling the sweeper downstairs!)
My sons had no qualms about doing "Math". They no longer associate "Math" with boring figures in a textbook. They associate it with life. Doing something for a purpose.
Another example of that would be just the other day in the truck on the way home from the Jungle Book play. I was sitting outside the OLD NAVY store with Savannah, my 6 year old, Aaron my 4 year old, and Jaidyn, my 2 year old (who was asleep). My 28 week pregnant body hurt too bad to go back into another store, especially with Jaidyn asleep for her nap, so I parked by the doors, and let my 8 and 10 year old boys go in to exchange their new jeans for a size bigger by themselves.
SIDE NOTE: This would be considered real world experience, and socializing with people not their own age. :)
So, anyway, Savannah and I were talking, while we waited, about how many weeks until some event that is coming up.. I can't remember what it was, but we were saying it'd be 6 weeks yet. She wanted to know how many days that was, so I told her that there are 7 days in a week, and there'd be 6 of those. She began counting this up on her fingers, but this became too hard quickly, and I introduced her to the cool concept of multiplication. Instead of doing all that adding, just memorize the fact that 6 weeks times 7 days in a week means 42 days. She wanted to know how many days there were (that was her motivation for learning). It wasn't because her schoolbook said that she must learn that 6 times 7 equals 42. It was not an abstract fact, but a concrete one attached to an idea. Real life.
Just as we were finishing this discussion, the boys hopped back in the truck, and overheard the Math quizzing. This lead to me quizzing them on the higher multiplication tables all the way home. Every once in a while they love for me to quiz them on their "times tables" although they don't associate them with that dreaded school term. Travis got 11 x 12 = 132 even before Jesse did! We had a good time with it. We laughed out loud when I told Jesse, "and it's not 12 de 12"... about the answer to the 11 x 12 problem. (This was right after I'd explained how 11's were pretty easy. 3 x 11 = 33 (3rd de 3), and 4 x 11 = 44 (4 de 4)... Get it?" It was funny to us anyway. :)
Another example of real life Math (not to mention free thought, creativity, and dedication to finishing a self-appointed task), would be the new game my boys came up with the same day we figured up the basement flooring. They were all excited about getting all the foam squares, and ran upstairs while I was talking with my MIL and playing with the younger 3 children.
After a while, they came downstairs telling us about this new game they had come up with. They called it Human Clix. It's their variation of the Hero Clix game that they play with comic book characters on a paper map. Basically, they themselves are the characters in their game, and they play it on the foam squares as a gameboard.. sort of like chess.
They actually sat down for hours (spread out over a couple of days), and came up with multiple character identities and abilities. Each ability having a numerical value assigned to it, so you can figure out who is beating who after one attacks the other. They came up with some of their character's identities based on the super-hero's they had made up for themselves, their siblings, their cousins, and their friends a few months ago, which is another post in itself. Travis, my 8 year old, had this piece of yellow construction paper covered in columns of numbers! They were the numerical ablilities and attacks. I wouldn't dare try to explain it, because I don't understand it completely myself! :) LOL.. but they DO! And they have been playing the game with our 15 year old neighbor, Brandon, who has suddenly been interested in hanging out with the boys again. We took him and his sister Leah to a few things with us recently. Some horseback riding, and a play of the Legends of Sleepy Hollow.
It's like our prodigal surrogate children have come home... :) I enjoy having them as part of our children's lives.
Sorry, I got off the Math subject there... but anyway, there are 3 prime examples of how you CAN learn Math in real life without a textbook.
Oh yeah! I daresay that Jesse probably observed Math in action when he went to work building a 12 x 16 barn foundation with his Uncle Tim last week! Construction is defenitely a real life use of Math...
He worked for about 9 hours in 30 to 40 degree weather, and I'm sure he used Math again when they went directly after work to the comic book shop to spend the $13 Uncle Tim paid him! :)
Friday, October 20, 2006
Enjoying and respecting my kids
Yesterday, the kids had a day that was so chock full of “educational” activities, that I had to record it. I hope I can remember it all!
I got up at 7:30am, and wrote up two professional sounding documents for the “franchise sale” of our cookie business to Lauren and Scott. When the kids got up I read them to them because I was excited about them. We talked a little about how the transaction is going to go.
The kids got up later than usual… around 8:30am or 9, because they’d gotten to bed late. Jesse had stayed up reading his Bionicle book because he couldn’t get the thought of a monster from the Moby Dick story out of his head. They’d listened to the first part of the story on CD before going to sleep. Well, before the younger kids fell asleep. Like I said, Jesse couldn’t get to sleep, so he read. He read the first 72 pages of the book that night.
So, in the morning, after breakfast, I bathed the youngest two kids, and we went to the library. This was on my suggestion to Savannah, because she really wants to become a masseuse who gets paid. She came down in the morning, when I was busy at the desk, telling me how she wanted to set up doing massages in her bedroom for money.
Now, my first reaction was to wave her off telling her that she’s too young, and no one is going to pay her until she is older and has more experience. Pretty standard parental reaction. But then I thought… No, that’s not respecting her feelings. That’s treating her as if she were “just a kid” which is a phrase that I want to rid from my vocabulary and my mindset. Kids are small people. This does not make their thoughts and feelings any less valuable, and they are certainly as real to them as us adults’ are to us!
So, I told her, “Well, Savannah, if you really want to get paid to do massages, then you are going to have to get more experience. You are going to have to learn where the muscles of the body are, and learn some massage techniques.” She agreed to this because this is something she really wants to do. I told her that probably right now, myself, and her two grandmas are the only ones that will pay her to massage them. She was OK with that. So, I told her we could go to the library to get some books on muscles of the body, and massage. “When?!” She asked, all excited.
Here was another parental opportunity. Should I say, “Whenever we have the time, and risk her losing interest? Or should I take advantage of her desire to learn while it is fresh? We had company coming over in about 2 and a half hours, and the house was somewhat messy. I also had nothing planned for lunch for me, my 5 kids, and the 2 visitors coming.
In my old mindframe of thinking that if I don’t have the house spic and span, “people will think that I’m not a good mom/housewife”… or that if I “waste time” going to the library I won’t get anything “real” done… I may have told her that we’d go “as soon as we could”, which may have never materialized, and her wishes to be a masseuse would be blown by as “just something a kid wants”, not all that important, because she’ll go on to something else really soon, because that’s what kids do. BUT! And it’s a big but! I would have lost a learning opportunity, and more importantly, an opportunity to show my daughter that she and her desires matter to me.
All these thoughts went through my mind in less than a minute. (Amazing how quickly our minds process so much information, huh?) So, I said, “Right now.”
“Really? She asked. We can go to the library, right now?!”
Yep. I answered. As soon as you get washed up, comb your hair and get dressed, and I bathe the younger two, we’ll go. She excitedly jumped up to go get ready. Of course she wanted to leave as soon as she was ready, but she understood that I needed to bathe the younger two kids, and the timing worked out better for us to wait a little while, since we would go to the library, check our P.O. Box, and then pick up pizza for lunch with our company on our way home.
Because our van was in the shop, limiting our car seating to 5 people, and Travis said he was too tired to go anyway, I let him stay home alone. I asked Jesse, my 10 year old, if he would go along to watch Jaidyn, my 2 year old, so that I could spend time with Savannah helping her find the right books. Aaron, my 4 year old is pretty self sufficient, and he went to look at books for himself. (This was at our little local library, so I wasn’t worried about him getting lost. It’s VERY small!)
I really enjoyed sitting with Savannah one on one, and looking through the books, picking out age appropriate books with lots of illustrations. We got 5 books including one, that just discusses the sense of touch, and it’s healing properties.
Jesse took Jaidyn to the video section first where she picked out an Elmo video. Then, he got her an Elmo book and read it to her. This warmed my heart to see my 10 year old lovingly taking care of his 2 year old sister, and to see her growing up to the point where she actually has a preference in characters, and can say the character’s name.
When Savannah and I were done choosing her books, I went to find Aaron and asked if he wanted to pick a book. Being 4, he just randomly grabbed one off the shelf, and was happy with that.
We got home, and pretty soon I noticed that Travis had picked up the book that Aaron had grabbed off the shelf. It turned out to be actually quite a long silly story about a doughnut who wants to live life instead of being eaten, and becomes someone’s “doughnut dog”. Travis and Jesse both sat quietly in the living room reading their books. Jesse kept reading his Bionicle book, and before our company had finished their 2 hour stay, he’d finished the whole 122 pages.
Our company was a woman in her early 50’s who is raising her rambunctious 3 year old granddaughter. She seemed quite impressed that the boys were just sitting there, reading books for quite a long time. “You have a couple of readers?” she asked. Implying that she thought that they really loved reading and did it all the time.
“Whenever they are interested in something”, I said. (Just the day before, I’d come down from a nap with my 2 year old to find Jesse reading a book about sharks. I was again amazed at the fact that my 10 year old was voluntarily reading an “educational” book with no story to entertain him. And he does remember those facts that he reads. He’ll quote them at times, and surprise me with his knowledge.) I told her that the boys usually like to play with their Hero Clix, and Pokemon card games. (If you’ve read my other posts, you know that these games involve a lot of Math.)
So, after the company left, Savannah really wanted me to read her massage book to her. I told her I would after my nap. (I am 26 and a half weeks pregnant with my 6th child and need naps.)
She watched a cartoon with Jaidyn to keep an eye on her while I napped in the room down the hall. When I got up, we sat in the living room, and started reading the books. She wanted to skip right to the massage, but I told her she needed to read some of the books. We skipped over the long paragraphs of small print that would have bored her, and just read the main points about how to prepare for giving a massage, what techniques to use on different parts of the body, why each technique is important and we looked at the muscle books showing where the muscles are. We probably read for about 30 to 40 minutes. Technically, she was learning a lot of biology. But to her, it was just fun.
She kept asking, OK, now can we do the massage? So, I made sure to keep her interest, and not make it too long of a discussion. Then we went up to my room, and per the book’s instructions, set up a comfortable space to massage in. It was complete with candles, scents in the air, background sounds of the night, rain, and waterfall, pillows for support, and massage oil. I instructed her, and she referred to the book as she massaged my face, hands, and feet. She probably massaged me for over a half hour! Talk about enjoyable education! We were interrupted a few times by Aaron and Jaidyn, but Savannah’s interest in continuing to massage did not wane. She would go help Jaidyn with something she needed, or wait while I helped Aaron, and was anxiously awaiting beginning again. We discussed how my masseuse does a lot of the things mentioned in the book, and the reasons why. She knows who the masseuse is because she went with me, and met Sharon at my last massage. She waited in the living room while I had the massage, but I think next time, I may take her back to the massage room, and show it to her, and ask Sharon if she minds if Savannah watches for about 5 minutes, and kind of give her a professional instruction session. Unschooling in action!
After Savannah massaged me, I asked her if she wanted a massage, and she did, so I gave her a one. Altogether yesterday, I’d say I spent about 3 hours spending quality time with my 6 year old daughter doing something “educational”. And the entire time, she never lost interest, nothing was forced, it was all something that she really wanted to do, and will remember me taking the time to do with her for the rest of her life. I was very happy with my decision to say, “Yes, we’ll go now to the library!”
Well, I know this is a long post, but I’m trying to remember what all other things went on yesterday… Aaron is starting to draw Pokemon characters, because he is seeing Travis do it. He is learning hand eye coordination, developing his drawing skills, and learning how not to compare himself to other people, especially older people who’ve been doing something longer than he has. He is learning that he can do things at his age level, and still be proud of what he’s doing.
He is not only drawing, but he is labeling his characters. This means that he has to learn to spell them. At 4 and a half, he is learning to write all of his letters correctly, and to spell quite a few words, just because it is something he likes to do.
SIDE NOTE: I AM NOT saying here that unschooling your child will make them an early reader just because they are not forced into learning to read. I AM SAYING, however, that your child does not need to have a set aside period of time to be “taught” their letters! They do not need you to say, “Look! This is the letter A! The letter A makes 3 sounds!” and go on to make the sounds. That kind of teaching is boring for some kids. Granted some kids like it, but my point is that the lecture format is not the ONLY type of learning! Your child WILL at his own rate of readiness, be interested in reading and writing. Through the natural process of life, reading and writing will become a necessity for certain activities that your child is interested in doing. They will naturally come to you, asking, “What does this say? How do you spell this word?” And you will tell them, and it will stick in their heads, because they wanted to know it. And over a period of time, longer for some, shorter for others, they will begin to learn to read and write. I know that this seems so impossible. We are so brainwashed into thinking that if we do not follow a school format, whether in school, or at home, that our children will not learn. I have only been unschooling for a year, but I have seen so much evidence in all 5 of my children, ages 2 to 10, that learning takes place in all types of settings, that I am convinced that allowing my children to learn their own way, at their own pace, is what is best for them. END SIDE NOTE :)
You know, I cannot recall what other “educational activities” my kids performed yesterday. I know you could label their swinging on ropes and playing with their friends in our basement,“gym”, and you could say that all the drawing, writing, and creating was “art”, and the reading was “Language”…. But to my kids, they went about their day just “doing and living”, and I never once heard the words, “I’m bored, Mom.” They are self sufficient to find ways to occupy their time. I think they may have watched a couple of videos with their 2 year old sister… they were her favorites, Franklin the Turtle, and Elmo. But they did not spend all day vegged out with programs that were bad for them, “ruining” their minds, like some people would have you believe that unschoolers do.
It’s just a fact that when you encourage your kids to find things to do on their own, they become capable of such a task. More capable I dare say, than their school-going counterparts who are handed things to do all day long, and are so fried from school that they look for ways to veg out for the rest of the evening.
Well, this may be my longest post yet. Thanks for reading! I like the fact that I can read this in the future, and enjoy remembering the time I had with my kids before they “left the nest”.
I got up at 7:30am, and wrote up two professional sounding documents for the “franchise sale” of our cookie business to Lauren and Scott. When the kids got up I read them to them because I was excited about them. We talked a little about how the transaction is going to go.
The kids got up later than usual… around 8:30am or 9, because they’d gotten to bed late. Jesse had stayed up reading his Bionicle book because he couldn’t get the thought of a monster from the Moby Dick story out of his head. They’d listened to the first part of the story on CD before going to sleep. Well, before the younger kids fell asleep. Like I said, Jesse couldn’t get to sleep, so he read. He read the first 72 pages of the book that night.
So, in the morning, after breakfast, I bathed the youngest two kids, and we went to the library. This was on my suggestion to Savannah, because she really wants to become a masseuse who gets paid. She came down in the morning, when I was busy at the desk, telling me how she wanted to set up doing massages in her bedroom for money.
Now, my first reaction was to wave her off telling her that she’s too young, and no one is going to pay her until she is older and has more experience. Pretty standard parental reaction. But then I thought… No, that’s not respecting her feelings. That’s treating her as if she were “just a kid” which is a phrase that I want to rid from my vocabulary and my mindset. Kids are small people. This does not make their thoughts and feelings any less valuable, and they are certainly as real to them as us adults’ are to us!
So, I told her, “Well, Savannah, if you really want to get paid to do massages, then you are going to have to get more experience. You are going to have to learn where the muscles of the body are, and learn some massage techniques.” She agreed to this because this is something she really wants to do. I told her that probably right now, myself, and her two grandmas are the only ones that will pay her to massage them. She was OK with that. So, I told her we could go to the library to get some books on muscles of the body, and massage. “When?!” She asked, all excited.
Here was another parental opportunity. Should I say, “Whenever we have the time, and risk her losing interest? Or should I take advantage of her desire to learn while it is fresh? We had company coming over in about 2 and a half hours, and the house was somewhat messy. I also had nothing planned for lunch for me, my 5 kids, and the 2 visitors coming.
In my old mindframe of thinking that if I don’t have the house spic and span, “people will think that I’m not a good mom/housewife”… or that if I “waste time” going to the library I won’t get anything “real” done… I may have told her that we’d go “as soon as we could”, which may have never materialized, and her wishes to be a masseuse would be blown by as “just something a kid wants”, not all that important, because she’ll go on to something else really soon, because that’s what kids do. BUT! And it’s a big but! I would have lost a learning opportunity, and more importantly, an opportunity to show my daughter that she and her desires matter to me.
All these thoughts went through my mind in less than a minute. (Amazing how quickly our minds process so much information, huh?) So, I said, “Right now.”
“Really? She asked. We can go to the library, right now?!”
Yep. I answered. As soon as you get washed up, comb your hair and get dressed, and I bathe the younger two, we’ll go. She excitedly jumped up to go get ready. Of course she wanted to leave as soon as she was ready, but she understood that I needed to bathe the younger two kids, and the timing worked out better for us to wait a little while, since we would go to the library, check our P.O. Box, and then pick up pizza for lunch with our company on our way home.
Because our van was in the shop, limiting our car seating to 5 people, and Travis said he was too tired to go anyway, I let him stay home alone. I asked Jesse, my 10 year old, if he would go along to watch Jaidyn, my 2 year old, so that I could spend time with Savannah helping her find the right books. Aaron, my 4 year old is pretty self sufficient, and he went to look at books for himself. (This was at our little local library, so I wasn’t worried about him getting lost. It’s VERY small!)
I really enjoyed sitting with Savannah one on one, and looking through the books, picking out age appropriate books with lots of illustrations. We got 5 books including one, that just discusses the sense of touch, and it’s healing properties.
Jesse took Jaidyn to the video section first where she picked out an Elmo video. Then, he got her an Elmo book and read it to her. This warmed my heart to see my 10 year old lovingly taking care of his 2 year old sister, and to see her growing up to the point where she actually has a preference in characters, and can say the character’s name.
When Savannah and I were done choosing her books, I went to find Aaron and asked if he wanted to pick a book. Being 4, he just randomly grabbed one off the shelf, and was happy with that.
We got home, and pretty soon I noticed that Travis had picked up the book that Aaron had grabbed off the shelf. It turned out to be actually quite a long silly story about a doughnut who wants to live life instead of being eaten, and becomes someone’s “doughnut dog”. Travis and Jesse both sat quietly in the living room reading their books. Jesse kept reading his Bionicle book, and before our company had finished their 2 hour stay, he’d finished the whole 122 pages.
Our company was a woman in her early 50’s who is raising her rambunctious 3 year old granddaughter. She seemed quite impressed that the boys were just sitting there, reading books for quite a long time. “You have a couple of readers?” she asked. Implying that she thought that they really loved reading and did it all the time.
“Whenever they are interested in something”, I said. (Just the day before, I’d come down from a nap with my 2 year old to find Jesse reading a book about sharks. I was again amazed at the fact that my 10 year old was voluntarily reading an “educational” book with no story to entertain him. And he does remember those facts that he reads. He’ll quote them at times, and surprise me with his knowledge.) I told her that the boys usually like to play with their Hero Clix, and Pokemon card games. (If you’ve read my other posts, you know that these games involve a lot of Math.)
So, after the company left, Savannah really wanted me to read her massage book to her. I told her I would after my nap. (I am 26 and a half weeks pregnant with my 6th child and need naps.)
She watched a cartoon with Jaidyn to keep an eye on her while I napped in the room down the hall. When I got up, we sat in the living room, and started reading the books. She wanted to skip right to the massage, but I told her she needed to read some of the books. We skipped over the long paragraphs of small print that would have bored her, and just read the main points about how to prepare for giving a massage, what techniques to use on different parts of the body, why each technique is important and we looked at the muscle books showing where the muscles are. We probably read for about 30 to 40 minutes. Technically, she was learning a lot of biology. But to her, it was just fun.
She kept asking, OK, now can we do the massage? So, I made sure to keep her interest, and not make it too long of a discussion. Then we went up to my room, and per the book’s instructions, set up a comfortable space to massage in. It was complete with candles, scents in the air, background sounds of the night, rain, and waterfall, pillows for support, and massage oil. I instructed her, and she referred to the book as she massaged my face, hands, and feet. She probably massaged me for over a half hour! Talk about enjoyable education! We were interrupted a few times by Aaron and Jaidyn, but Savannah’s interest in continuing to massage did not wane. She would go help Jaidyn with something she needed, or wait while I helped Aaron, and was anxiously awaiting beginning again. We discussed how my masseuse does a lot of the things mentioned in the book, and the reasons why. She knows who the masseuse is because she went with me, and met Sharon at my last massage. She waited in the living room while I had the massage, but I think next time, I may take her back to the massage room, and show it to her, and ask Sharon if she minds if Savannah watches for about 5 minutes, and kind of give her a professional instruction session. Unschooling in action!
After Savannah massaged me, I asked her if she wanted a massage, and she did, so I gave her a one. Altogether yesterday, I’d say I spent about 3 hours spending quality time with my 6 year old daughter doing something “educational”. And the entire time, she never lost interest, nothing was forced, it was all something that she really wanted to do, and will remember me taking the time to do with her for the rest of her life. I was very happy with my decision to say, “Yes, we’ll go now to the library!”
Well, I know this is a long post, but I’m trying to remember what all other things went on yesterday… Aaron is starting to draw Pokemon characters, because he is seeing Travis do it. He is learning hand eye coordination, developing his drawing skills, and learning how not to compare himself to other people, especially older people who’ve been doing something longer than he has. He is learning that he can do things at his age level, and still be proud of what he’s doing.
He is not only drawing, but he is labeling his characters. This means that he has to learn to spell them. At 4 and a half, he is learning to write all of his letters correctly, and to spell quite a few words, just because it is something he likes to do.
SIDE NOTE: I AM NOT saying here that unschooling your child will make them an early reader just because they are not forced into learning to read. I AM SAYING, however, that your child does not need to have a set aside period of time to be “taught” their letters! They do not need you to say, “Look! This is the letter A! The letter A makes 3 sounds!” and go on to make the sounds. That kind of teaching is boring for some kids. Granted some kids like it, but my point is that the lecture format is not the ONLY type of learning! Your child WILL at his own rate of readiness, be interested in reading and writing. Through the natural process of life, reading and writing will become a necessity for certain activities that your child is interested in doing. They will naturally come to you, asking, “What does this say? How do you spell this word?” And you will tell them, and it will stick in their heads, because they wanted to know it. And over a period of time, longer for some, shorter for others, they will begin to learn to read and write. I know that this seems so impossible. We are so brainwashed into thinking that if we do not follow a school format, whether in school, or at home, that our children will not learn. I have only been unschooling for a year, but I have seen so much evidence in all 5 of my children, ages 2 to 10, that learning takes place in all types of settings, that I am convinced that allowing my children to learn their own way, at their own pace, is what is best for them. END SIDE NOTE :)
You know, I cannot recall what other “educational activities” my kids performed yesterday. I know you could label their swinging on ropes and playing with their friends in our basement,“gym”, and you could say that all the drawing, writing, and creating was “art”, and the reading was “Language”…. But to my kids, they went about their day just “doing and living”, and I never once heard the words, “I’m bored, Mom.” They are self sufficient to find ways to occupy their time. I think they may have watched a couple of videos with their 2 year old sister… they were her favorites, Franklin the Turtle, and Elmo. But they did not spend all day vegged out with programs that were bad for them, “ruining” their minds, like some people would have you believe that unschoolers do.
It’s just a fact that when you encourage your kids to find things to do on their own, they become capable of such a task. More capable I dare say, than their school-going counterparts who are handed things to do all day long, and are so fried from school that they look for ways to veg out for the rest of the evening.
Well, this may be my longest post yet. Thanks for reading! I like the fact that I can read this in the future, and enjoy remembering the time I had with my kids before they “left the nest”.
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
"A Typical Unschooling Day"
Here is an email exchange between myself and another unschooling family whose house I absolutely love! View the pics of it and them here: Well, I'll have to ask her for the web address for the pics again.... but here's the email anyway.
>From: "John and Pam Hensley"
>Reply-To: HomefiresJournal@yahoogroups.com
>To:
>Subject: Re: [HomefiresJournal] Re: Deedee's house/ ot asking michelle to
>share about her unschooling
>Date: Fri, 6 Oct 2006 23:53:11 -0500
>
>Michelle,
>Would you mind sharing a 'typical day' in your unschooling household?
>Wondering, what are the ages of your children.
>My son was talking about his hs'd friend telling him that he 'had not yet
>begun biology this year' and another ps'd aquaintance not getting 'weekend
>priveleges' due to falling down a grade in biology. Then he asked more
>questions and I tried to tell him learning is life and living it, not
>regurgitating memorized facts out of a biology text book. He asked one more
>question about biology and I said, 'well, it is what we are doing with that
>catepillar who is currenly living in my hat box due to the fact that your
>little brother sat on and broke his bug catcher/holder and we did not have
>one to put the bug in to watch it turn into a lovely butterfly; That is
>biology in our home school :) ' I think he understood...
>Thanks for sharing. I just wonder what other unschooling mommies are doing
>these days.
>I'd love it if you would also share about your new business.
>We have been self employed the 16 years we have been together; it is a
>love/hate thing lol.
>we are basically retired now but have tried many small homebased
>businesses; it has been rather frustrating but God is always faithful to
>provide.
>I wish you all his blessings in your venture!
>Pam
Hi Pam!
Thanks for asking! I am curious about your typical "school" day as
well. I love being on the homefires list, but it's nice to talk to or email
other moms directly and see what they do.
My kids are 10, 8, 6, 4, 2, and the baby is 25 weeks in utero. My 8, 6,
and 4 year old's birthdays are coming up real soon, though.
We started homeschooling with the A Beka Book Christian curriculum when
my son was in first grade because that's what all the homeschooler's I knew
were doing, and I had only read one book on unschooling, (Mary Griffin's,
which I love) but being a first timer, had no confidence in the "no
curriculum" idea.
My mother in law was actually a kindergarten teacher until she retired to
be a full time grandma, so she has taught my first 3 children how to read,
amoung other things during their "kindergarten year". They would go to her
house for 3 hours or so, and learn from her. After that, I began the
"school at home" with them, with the classroom and all. I taught 1st, 2nd,
and 3rd grade all the way through to my first son, and 1st all the way
through to my 2nd son. Then when they were in 4th and 2nd grades, and my
daughter was in kindergarten with her grandma, I started really researching
unschooling.
All I knew was that my boys hated "textbook time", and therefore assumed
that they hated school. I was sick of forcing it on them, and wanted
learning to be fun. We would attempt fun projects here and there, but still
try to "get our other work done", and it was all really stressful.
We went to the Unschooling Conference in St. Louis, Missouri, in October of
2005. My mother in law went with us to help take care of Jaidyn my
youngest, who was a little over a year at the time. This allowed James (my
husband) and I to go to the talks and listen uninterrupted. We were
partially convinced that this was something we wanted to try before we went
(actually James more than myself, although I knew what we were doing wasn't
working), and by the time we left the whole family was excited about putting
the textbooks on the shelf and learning through living. It took some time
for my inlaws to "see" it working... in fact my Father in law was highly
doubtful! But within the last year, we have all seen so much learning
taking place in my children's lives, that we aren't looking back, and my
father in law is now advocating this "method" of learning to his other sons
for their children. :) One of his favorite ways to contribute is to tape
and watch classic movies or educational shows, or just plain interesting
stuff for them to watch. A lot of times they watch it with him. (We don't
have cable right now, so this works great for us, plus I don't have to spend
the time surfing the cable channels!)
Sorry if you didn't want that much detail.... I love to write.
Especially about my kids.
So... a typical day.
We have no set "learning" time anymore. My kids get up when they want,
and usually get their own breakfast. If I've had a late night, I'll sleep
in, and the older kids help the younger ones with their breakfast. They
know to come get me if they need help with a diaper or something, though. :)
I do the finances for our business (Yay! We are self employed too!),
and that means I'm at the computer usually for at least part of most days.
Some days I do nothing for the business except check the P.O. Box, and we'll
go to the park and play. We'll get pizza at the local place and walk to the
park on a nice day. We live in a small rural farm town.
How do you describe an unschooling day? My kids build things with
household objects, like tents from blankets, pillows, and chairs. They
build golf courses, and miniature houses with the many books we have piled
on the fireplace hearth. They also pick up these books and read them.
Sometimes to themselves, sometimes to their younger siblings. We try to go
to the library every couple of weeks to purge and replenish this supply. We
take our bag from the unschooling conference every time! :) It says, Birds
Fly, Fish Swim, Humans Learn.
What else... my boys love to play the Pokemon Card game and also another
strategy game with comic book character figurines on a map called HeroClix.
Have you or your kids ever heard of it? If you have trouble with any of
them liking math, and they like make believe... get one of these games! My
8 year old sat for half an hour by himself yesterday "doing Math". :) I
smiled to myself. If you asked what he was doing, he'd tell you that he was
figuring out which one of his Hero Clix characters was the strongest. Each
character has different points assigned to it for it's strength, it's
attacks, and weaknesses, etc... it's very complicated. So, he sat their
adding, subtracting, etc., for about a half hour. Turns out his Superman
Blue is the strongest.
My 6 year old girl and four year old boy also have their own Pokemon
cards, and Savannah (the 6 year old) actually plays at the free play
tournaments when we go, and she battles her brothers at home too. The older
kids have made up a simplified version of the game for their 4 year old
brother to play with his cards. He doesn't really understand the points
system yet, though, so when he trades cards, he trades based on how much he
likes the Pokemon, and they have to watch out for him so he doesn't get
traded down, especially at the free plays with other people.
Oh yeah, the boys learned about HeroClix from their uncle who loves
video games and comic books, and now they are getting their other uncle into
it. Last night they all got together at Uncle Tim's to have a HeroClix
tournament! The neighbor boys, who are my boys ages, came over to watch and
learn.
My oldest, Jesse, loves all things scientific. He gets this from his
dad. We go camping as often as we can, and usually the fireside talks end
up being about something scientific because the kids ask all kinds of "why?"
questions, and James loves to answer them, or look them up if he doesn't
know. At a camping trip this year they made a flame thrower with a can of
OFF! :) He did caution them multiple times of the dangers, even telling
them about how he singed his arm hairs once by not doing it correctly, and
explaining the scientific reasons behind why there is a correct way of
making a flamethrower. I don't know them, I'm more of the writing reading
type.
That's another thing we do is I like to read books to them before bed at
night. Recently we've fallen out of the habit since I am usually too tired
being this far along in my pregnancy. But I did read to my daughter in the
evening the other day. She absolutely LOVES horses! So, we were reading a
horse story.
I am on an email list for a homeschool field trip group. It's a fun way
to meet new people, and this woman does a fabulous job coming up with a
variety of field trips. This month we will be going to a play of "The
Jungle Book", we went to a pizza place for a behind the scenes tour, we'll
be going to a historical 1800's farm to learn about the agricultural
lifestyle, and a pumpkin patch to learn Ohio's history.... Next month, I am
taking my daughter to a Horse Hospital with this group. She is sooo looking
forward to it.
Well, I'm describing a lot of things my kids do, but not really what a
typical day is like.
In a typical day, my kids find things for themselves to do. They ride bikes
and scooters, they take walks (lucky for us their grandma and grandpa, and
now their cousins, all live in the same neighborhood), they visit friends,
and occasionally watch TV. They play their HeroClix and Pokemon games, and
they make up games with each other. They discuss things with me, or we bake
and cook together. One of their favorite things to do, with or without
their neighbor friends is to play "Town" in the basement. The basement is
what we call "Kid Kingdom"... to the eye of an ordinary adult it looks like
a trash dump with piles of boxes scattered here and there. The boxes are my
storage containing clothing mostly, and some picture frames, holiday decor,
etc... But when the kids take you on a tour of the basement, you see it
come alive into different stores, daycares, a cafe (where you can watch tv
while you eat), a bank, even a mobile advertising bike (based loosely on my
husband's mobile advertising business). They have a mini economy going.
Their currency is a combination of Monopoly money, and some play money.
They have auctions, and stores, they combine and dismantle businesses
regularly. Their neighbor friends who play store the most with them are an
11 year old girl, and a 15 year old boy.
Although, since the beginning of this school year, the 15 year old has,
I think, begun to be busy with his teenage school life, and hasn't been
around. My boys are disappointed, but we've been warning them for about 2
years that it'd happen soon.
So, I don't know if this LONGGGG email has answered your question
or not... :)
Write me back and let me know, and please feel free to write me your own
long email describing your children's activities! Oh yeah, and please tell
me about your self employment too! My husband and I have been self employed
most of our working lives. I would love to share about it with you in
another email, but fear that it would make this one way too long.
Thanks for reading!
Michelle Schooling
>From: "John and Pam Hensley"
>Reply-To: HomefiresJournal@yahoogroups.com
>To:
>Subject: Re: [HomefiresJournal] Re: Deedee's house/ ot asking michelle to
>share about her unschooling
>Date: Fri, 6 Oct 2006 23:53:11 -0500
>
>Michelle,
>Would you mind sharing a 'typical day' in your unschooling household?
>Wondering, what are the ages of your children.
>My son was talking about his hs'd friend telling him that he 'had not yet
>begun biology this year' and another ps'd aquaintance not getting 'weekend
>priveleges' due to falling down a grade in biology. Then he asked more
>questions and I tried to tell him learning is life and living it, not
>regurgitating memorized facts out of a biology text book. He asked one more
>question about biology and I said, 'well, it is what we are doing with that
>catepillar who is currenly living in my hat box due to the fact that your
>little brother sat on and broke his bug catcher/holder and we did not have
>one to put the bug in to watch it turn into a lovely butterfly; That is
>biology in our home school :) ' I think he understood...
>Thanks for sharing. I just wonder what other unschooling mommies are doing
>these days.
>I'd love it if you would also share about your new business.
>We have been self employed the 16 years we have been together; it is a
>love/hate thing lol.
>we are basically retired now but have tried many small homebased
>businesses; it has been rather frustrating but God is always faithful to
>provide.
>I wish you all his blessings in your venture!
>Pam
Hi Pam!
Thanks for asking! I am curious about your typical "school" day as
well. I love being on the homefires list, but it's nice to talk to or email
other moms directly and see what they do.
My kids are 10, 8, 6, 4, 2, and the baby is 25 weeks in utero. My 8, 6,
and 4 year old's birthdays are coming up real soon, though.
We started homeschooling with the A Beka Book Christian curriculum when
my son was in first grade because that's what all the homeschooler's I knew
were doing, and I had only read one book on unschooling, (Mary Griffin's,
which I love) but being a first timer, had no confidence in the "no
curriculum" idea.
My mother in law was actually a kindergarten teacher until she retired to
be a full time grandma, so she has taught my first 3 children how to read,
amoung other things during their "kindergarten year". They would go to her
house for 3 hours or so, and learn from her. After that, I began the
"school at home" with them, with the classroom and all. I taught 1st, 2nd,
and 3rd grade all the way through to my first son, and 1st all the way
through to my 2nd son. Then when they were in 4th and 2nd grades, and my
daughter was in kindergarten with her grandma, I started really researching
unschooling.
All I knew was that my boys hated "textbook time", and therefore assumed
that they hated school. I was sick of forcing it on them, and wanted
learning to be fun. We would attempt fun projects here and there, but still
try to "get our other work done", and it was all really stressful.
We went to the Unschooling Conference in St. Louis, Missouri, in October of
2005. My mother in law went with us to help take care of Jaidyn my
youngest, who was a little over a year at the time. This allowed James (my
husband) and I to go to the talks and listen uninterrupted. We were
partially convinced that this was something we wanted to try before we went
(actually James more than myself, although I knew what we were doing wasn't
working), and by the time we left the whole family was excited about putting
the textbooks on the shelf and learning through living. It took some time
for my inlaws to "see" it working... in fact my Father in law was highly
doubtful! But within the last year, we have all seen so much learning
taking place in my children's lives, that we aren't looking back, and my
father in law is now advocating this "method" of learning to his other sons
for their children. :) One of his favorite ways to contribute is to tape
and watch classic movies or educational shows, or just plain interesting
stuff for them to watch. A lot of times they watch it with him. (We don't
have cable right now, so this works great for us, plus I don't have to spend
the time surfing the cable channels!)
Sorry if you didn't want that much detail.... I love to write.
Especially about my kids.
So... a typical day.
We have no set "learning" time anymore. My kids get up when they want,
and usually get their own breakfast. If I've had a late night, I'll sleep
in, and the older kids help the younger ones with their breakfast. They
know to come get me if they need help with a diaper or something, though. :)
I do the finances for our business (Yay! We are self employed too!),
and that means I'm at the computer usually for at least part of most days.
Some days I do nothing for the business except check the P.O. Box, and we'll
go to the park and play. We'll get pizza at the local place and walk to the
park on a nice day. We live in a small rural farm town.
How do you describe an unschooling day? My kids build things with
household objects, like tents from blankets, pillows, and chairs. They
build golf courses, and miniature houses with the many books we have piled
on the fireplace hearth. They also pick up these books and read them.
Sometimes to themselves, sometimes to their younger siblings. We try to go
to the library every couple of weeks to purge and replenish this supply. We
take our bag from the unschooling conference every time! :) It says, Birds
Fly, Fish Swim, Humans Learn.
What else... my boys love to play the Pokemon Card game and also another
strategy game with comic book character figurines on a map called HeroClix.
Have you or your kids ever heard of it? If you have trouble with any of
them liking math, and they like make believe... get one of these games! My
8 year old sat for half an hour by himself yesterday "doing Math". :) I
smiled to myself. If you asked what he was doing, he'd tell you that he was
figuring out which one of his Hero Clix characters was the strongest. Each
character has different points assigned to it for it's strength, it's
attacks, and weaknesses, etc... it's very complicated. So, he sat their
adding, subtracting, etc., for about a half hour. Turns out his Superman
Blue is the strongest.
My 6 year old girl and four year old boy also have their own Pokemon
cards, and Savannah (the 6 year old) actually plays at the free play
tournaments when we go, and she battles her brothers at home too. The older
kids have made up a simplified version of the game for their 4 year old
brother to play with his cards. He doesn't really understand the points
system yet, though, so when he trades cards, he trades based on how much he
likes the Pokemon, and they have to watch out for him so he doesn't get
traded down, especially at the free plays with other people.
Oh yeah, the boys learned about HeroClix from their uncle who loves
video games and comic books, and now they are getting their other uncle into
it. Last night they all got together at Uncle Tim's to have a HeroClix
tournament! The neighbor boys, who are my boys ages, came over to watch and
learn.
My oldest, Jesse, loves all things scientific. He gets this from his
dad. We go camping as often as we can, and usually the fireside talks end
up being about something scientific because the kids ask all kinds of "why?"
questions, and James loves to answer them, or look them up if he doesn't
know. At a camping trip this year they made a flame thrower with a can of
OFF! :) He did caution them multiple times of the dangers, even telling
them about how he singed his arm hairs once by not doing it correctly, and
explaining the scientific reasons behind why there is a correct way of
making a flamethrower. I don't know them, I'm more of the writing reading
type.
That's another thing we do is I like to read books to them before bed at
night. Recently we've fallen out of the habit since I am usually too tired
being this far along in my pregnancy. But I did read to my daughter in the
evening the other day. She absolutely LOVES horses! So, we were reading a
horse story.
I am on an email list for a homeschool field trip group. It's a fun way
to meet new people, and this woman does a fabulous job coming up with a
variety of field trips. This month we will be going to a play of "The
Jungle Book", we went to a pizza place for a behind the scenes tour, we'll
be going to a historical 1800's farm to learn about the agricultural
lifestyle, and a pumpkin patch to learn Ohio's history.... Next month, I am
taking my daughter to a Horse Hospital with this group. She is sooo looking
forward to it.
Well, I'm describing a lot of things my kids do, but not really what a
typical day is like.
In a typical day, my kids find things for themselves to do. They ride bikes
and scooters, they take walks (lucky for us their grandma and grandpa, and
now their cousins, all live in the same neighborhood), they visit friends,
and occasionally watch TV. They play their HeroClix and Pokemon games, and
they make up games with each other. They discuss things with me, or we bake
and cook together. One of their favorite things to do, with or without
their neighbor friends is to play "Town" in the basement. The basement is
what we call "Kid Kingdom"... to the eye of an ordinary adult it looks like
a trash dump with piles of boxes scattered here and there. The boxes are my
storage containing clothing mostly, and some picture frames, holiday decor,
etc... But when the kids take you on a tour of the basement, you see it
come alive into different stores, daycares, a cafe (where you can watch tv
while you eat), a bank, even a mobile advertising bike (based loosely on my
husband's mobile advertising business). They have a mini economy going.
Their currency is a combination of Monopoly money, and some play money.
They have auctions, and stores, they combine and dismantle businesses
regularly. Their neighbor friends who play store the most with them are an
11 year old girl, and a 15 year old boy.
Although, since the beginning of this school year, the 15 year old has,
I think, begun to be busy with his teenage school life, and hasn't been
around. My boys are disappointed, but we've been warning them for about 2
years that it'd happen soon.
So, I don't know if this LONGGGG email has answered your question
or not... :)
Write me back and let me know, and please feel free to write me your own
long email describing your children's activities! Oh yeah, and please tell
me about your self employment too! My husband and I have been self employed
most of our working lives. I would love to share about it with you in
another email, but fear that it would make this one way too long.
Thanks for reading!
Michelle Schooling
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Unschooling Ourselves (a lot about James)
Today I had to meet James (my husband) at the office. He filed a 6 month extension for our 2005 taxes, and the time is almost up. He absolutely HATES numbers, and wanted my help. I like number crunching, and do most of the business finances myself. I have never had any kind of training, I just enjoy working with numbers, and am learning while doing.... Practise what you preach, right? :)
I had no idea what to expect. Doing taxes sounded daunting to me, but I barged into it with bravado. Turns out there wasn't much to it at all, the accountant handles a lot of the dirty work. James just couldn't even get his brain functioning in the numbers mode enough to fully figure out what the accountant needed. His brain is so full already of all the other aspects and pressures of the business that I am happy to help him in this area.
On the way to the office I heard this country song that I liked the words to. (I'm not a big country person, but man, have you listened to the radio lately? It sucks! You have to flip through the channels forever to find anything interesting!)
So, I'm this analytical person, right, and I can't just listen to music for the melody like James can... so I'm listening to the words of this country song, and agreeing with it. It said something like:
You can't learn to drive until you get behind the wheel,
You can't learn to pray till you're afraid of what you feel...
Basically the message was that until you actually live life doing real things, you haven't really lived. It reminded me of unschooling, and also of us starting a business that we weren't familiar with. Flying by the seat of your pants, learning as you do... That's a real education. Not the college "education" where you don't actually get out into the adult world until you're like 25 years old... Then - you start your real education.
So, when James started telling me how he feels bad about not seeing all these things he should have done before, I told him about the song... I said, how can you blame yourself for not seeing these things when it's your first time in this kind of a business? And he jumped in with both feet, not looking back, to head it up! He's getting an education in advertising the real way! No degree required. And funny enough, people with degrees in marketing and graphic design look up to him and respect his opinion because he's confident, and does his best. And it usually turns out great. These people have no idea that he just starting messing around with graphic design/advertising about a year ago, and has had no college "education" in it.
What can I say? I'm proud of my man for his accomplishments. His accomplishments of having the gusto to just get out there and do it. To take charge in a new environment, and have a can do attitude. I'm proud that my kids have such a great man for a dad. A good example of how to learn while living.... unschooling himself through life!
I had no idea what to expect. Doing taxes sounded daunting to me, but I barged into it with bravado. Turns out there wasn't much to it at all, the accountant handles a lot of the dirty work. James just couldn't even get his brain functioning in the numbers mode enough to fully figure out what the accountant needed. His brain is so full already of all the other aspects and pressures of the business that I am happy to help him in this area.
On the way to the office I heard this country song that I liked the words to. (I'm not a big country person, but man, have you listened to the radio lately? It sucks! You have to flip through the channels forever to find anything interesting!)
So, I'm this analytical person, right, and I can't just listen to music for the melody like James can... so I'm listening to the words of this country song, and agreeing with it. It said something like:
You can't learn to drive until you get behind the wheel,
You can't learn to pray till you're afraid of what you feel...
Basically the message was that until you actually live life doing real things, you haven't really lived. It reminded me of unschooling, and also of us starting a business that we weren't familiar with. Flying by the seat of your pants, learning as you do... That's a real education. Not the college "education" where you don't actually get out into the adult world until you're like 25 years old... Then - you start your real education.
So, when James started telling me how he feels bad about not seeing all these things he should have done before, I told him about the song... I said, how can you blame yourself for not seeing these things when it's your first time in this kind of a business? And he jumped in with both feet, not looking back, to head it up! He's getting an education in advertising the real way! No degree required. And funny enough, people with degrees in marketing and graphic design look up to him and respect his opinion because he's confident, and does his best. And it usually turns out great. These people have no idea that he just starting messing around with graphic design/advertising about a year ago, and has had no college "education" in it.
What can I say? I'm proud of my man for his accomplishments. His accomplishments of having the gusto to just get out there and do it. To take charge in a new environment, and have a can do attitude. I'm proud that my kids have such a great man for a dad. A good example of how to learn while living.... unschooling himself through life!
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
Just some day to day stuff....
I actually started this blog to keep track of some of the "educational" things we do, participate in, or talk about. Then it kind of evolved into my personal pulpit for a while...
Right now, I'm just kind of taking a backseat to life, and watching the goings on around me. I'm comfortable with where I am at, and not so worried anymore that I am "doing the right thing". I'm starting to see that there are many right ways to educate your children, and mine might not necessarily work for everyone out there for one reason or another.
I am loving how we do things and a lot more relaxed about where we are going. I read this great article the other day. It said that from the "research" that the authors have done, it has been "scientifically proven" that on the whole, kids cannot learn things like abstract Math (not connected to anything real) and Grammar (participles, diagramming sentences,etc.)from a textbook, before the age of ten. Now granted, they can memorize it, and seem to be doing the worksheets properly, but they "file" it in the wrong compartment of their minds, so that when they get into junior high, and their brain tries to access it to build on it, they cannot remember it, and have to relearn it anyway.
I put the words "research", and "scientifically proven" in parantheses, because so many people claim those words.... who knows what is fact or fiction. Anyway, I liked what the article said, and believe it to be true.
I am enjoying using my kids under 10 years to teach them real Math (concrete - as in actual objects or subjects that are in everyday life), and teaching them Language through everyday speech... Here are some examples:
The other evening, Travis comes into the living room and asks me, "Mom, what is heavier than an elephant, but can fly?" I thought for a minute, and said, "An airplane." Right!, He smiled. He had made up the riddle himself. So, then he asks James, "Dad, you make up your own riddle, and ask me.." (I'm paraphrasing here.)
James says, I'm not too good at making them up... How about, "What's black and white and red all over?" Travis doesn't get it. I help him out. Not red R-E-D, Travis... read R-E-A-D... what's black and white and "read" all over... I said, making a motion of reading a newspaper.. He got it. He learned the difference in how to spell red and read, how to use them in a sentence, and how to interchange them to make a play on words, in an instant. No textbook necessary.
This is such a minute example... there are sooo many times I hear the question, "Mom, how do you spell this?" I happen to be a good speller. But if I wasn't, you'd better believe I'd always have access to a dictionary! :) Maybe carry a paperback around with me! :) That question comes up constantly... Another example was when Travis wanted to sell his Hero Clix figurines. (He and Jesse had been arguing over the rules of the game a lot while playing, and he decided he was done. No more Hero Clix. "Jesse cheats EVERY game!"... Travis has a tendency to overdramatize... :)
Anyway, he got on Ebay, and had to look up some words, he'd never paid attention to spelling before... "Mom, how do you spell rookie? Experience? No, Experienced...." And at the same time he was learning these words, he was practicing his typing, and computer navigation.... Don'tcha just love learning while living? :)
A good example of learning real Math would be the cookie fundraiser we are planning to repeat this year. The kids are actually going to experience having their very own credit card! We are going to go to Sam's Club, and get one of their store cards, so that the kids can use it to buy the ingredients for the cookies. They (probably Jesse, mostly, maybe Travis... if he catches on) will be figuring up the cost of the ingredients which will involve A LOT of fractions, teaspoons, tablespoons, cups, multiplying, dividing, adding, subtracting,etc, etc... Not to mention the real world experience of calculating interest and having to pay it. I have a feeling my kids are going to argue about what they should buy in addition to cookie ingredients. Savannah and Travis will argue that they WILL pay the money back for that new toy, and Jesse will say, "No! We have to make the money first..." Or maybe the lure of credit will get him too... I'm excited to see! I'll update my blog as soon as I find out! :)
Cooking and/or baking are such excellent ways of teaching fractions and measurements. I know it's talked about a lot, but it's sooo true! The kids GET IT because it's right in front of them! It's not this circle on a page with lines through it marking halves, thirds, and fourths, which are words not connected with anything real, but the outline on the paper.... They associate fractions with REAL things. This cup is 1 whole cup. It'll take 2 of these half cups to fill it up with flour. It's soooo simple. I don't know why it's so hard for us to get that it could be that simple....
Learning days of the week, and months of the year, is such an easy to come by thing as well. My kids know exactly how many days it will be until Friday, because that is video game night! Savannah, Travis, and Jesse have it down pat. Aaron is learning by constantly asking, "What day is it?", and "How many days until Friday?" Or it's their friends, or cousins spending the night they are counting down to, or any other event... a field trip, Trick or Treat, the new baby's due date, etc.,etc...
Life provides so many opportunities for learning.
Another good example of learning language, is just the everyday conversation.. How often does this occur with your kids?... The kids says, "Mom, how come cats eat mouses?" You answer, "Because if cats didn't eat MICE, there would be too many of them around." Here, the child has learned about the food chain, the effects of its interruption, and they've learned that the plural of mouse is not mouses, but mice. Maybe you've never even paid attention to yourself doing this. But, believe it or not, you are teaching language much more effectively than any textbook (or teacher) ever could. Maybe your child won't remember that exact word the very first time (it just depends on their age). But over time, you will notice that the child naturally starts calling mice "mice"... not "mouses". If you want to, you can tell your child, (Like I did with this particular conversation with Savannah about mouses :), "Honey, the plural of mouse is mice... not mouses." And then continue to explain that plural means more than one. But even if you don't, they will come across that information sometime in their lives, and recognize it as the "educational" reason they say mice instead of mouses.
Well, that fulfills my blogging desire for the night. I wish I could write down every "educational" thing we discuss/do in everyday life... but alas.. I am tired. Good night!
Right now, I'm just kind of taking a backseat to life, and watching the goings on around me. I'm comfortable with where I am at, and not so worried anymore that I am "doing the right thing". I'm starting to see that there are many right ways to educate your children, and mine might not necessarily work for everyone out there for one reason or another.
I am loving how we do things and a lot more relaxed about where we are going. I read this great article the other day. It said that from the "research" that the authors have done, it has been "scientifically proven" that on the whole, kids cannot learn things like abstract Math (not connected to anything real) and Grammar (participles, diagramming sentences,etc.)from a textbook, before the age of ten. Now granted, they can memorize it, and seem to be doing the worksheets properly, but they "file" it in the wrong compartment of their minds, so that when they get into junior high, and their brain tries to access it to build on it, they cannot remember it, and have to relearn it anyway.
I put the words "research", and "scientifically proven" in parantheses, because so many people claim those words.... who knows what is fact or fiction. Anyway, I liked what the article said, and believe it to be true.
I am enjoying using my kids under 10 years to teach them real Math (concrete - as in actual objects or subjects that are in everyday life), and teaching them Language through everyday speech... Here are some examples:
The other evening, Travis comes into the living room and asks me, "Mom, what is heavier than an elephant, but can fly?" I thought for a minute, and said, "An airplane." Right!, He smiled. He had made up the riddle himself. So, then he asks James, "Dad, you make up your own riddle, and ask me.." (I'm paraphrasing here.)
James says, I'm not too good at making them up... How about, "What's black and white and red all over?" Travis doesn't get it. I help him out. Not red R-E-D, Travis... read R-E-A-D... what's black and white and "read" all over... I said, making a motion of reading a newspaper.. He got it. He learned the difference in how to spell red and read, how to use them in a sentence, and how to interchange them to make a play on words, in an instant. No textbook necessary.
This is such a minute example... there are sooo many times I hear the question, "Mom, how do you spell this?" I happen to be a good speller. But if I wasn't, you'd better believe I'd always have access to a dictionary! :) Maybe carry a paperback around with me! :) That question comes up constantly... Another example was when Travis wanted to sell his Hero Clix figurines. (He and Jesse had been arguing over the rules of the game a lot while playing, and he decided he was done. No more Hero Clix. "Jesse cheats EVERY game!"... Travis has a tendency to overdramatize... :)
Anyway, he got on Ebay, and had to look up some words, he'd never paid attention to spelling before... "Mom, how do you spell rookie? Experience? No, Experienced...." And at the same time he was learning these words, he was practicing his typing, and computer navigation.... Don'tcha just love learning while living? :)
A good example of learning real Math would be the cookie fundraiser we are planning to repeat this year. The kids are actually going to experience having their very own credit card! We are going to go to Sam's Club, and get one of their store cards, so that the kids can use it to buy the ingredients for the cookies. They (probably Jesse, mostly, maybe Travis... if he catches on) will be figuring up the cost of the ingredients which will involve A LOT of fractions, teaspoons, tablespoons, cups, multiplying, dividing, adding, subtracting,etc, etc... Not to mention the real world experience of calculating interest and having to pay it. I have a feeling my kids are going to argue about what they should buy in addition to cookie ingredients. Savannah and Travis will argue that they WILL pay the money back for that new toy, and Jesse will say, "No! We have to make the money first..." Or maybe the lure of credit will get him too... I'm excited to see! I'll update my blog as soon as I find out! :)
Cooking and/or baking are such excellent ways of teaching fractions and measurements. I know it's talked about a lot, but it's sooo true! The kids GET IT because it's right in front of them! It's not this circle on a page with lines through it marking halves, thirds, and fourths, which are words not connected with anything real, but the outline on the paper.... They associate fractions with REAL things. This cup is 1 whole cup. It'll take 2 of these half cups to fill it up with flour. It's soooo simple. I don't know why it's so hard for us to get that it could be that simple....
Learning days of the week, and months of the year, is such an easy to come by thing as well. My kids know exactly how many days it will be until Friday, because that is video game night! Savannah, Travis, and Jesse have it down pat. Aaron is learning by constantly asking, "What day is it?", and "How many days until Friday?" Or it's their friends, or cousins spending the night they are counting down to, or any other event... a field trip, Trick or Treat, the new baby's due date, etc.,etc...
Life provides so many opportunities for learning.
Another good example of learning language, is just the everyday conversation.. How often does this occur with your kids?... The kids says, "Mom, how come cats eat mouses?" You answer, "Because if cats didn't eat MICE, there would be too many of them around." Here, the child has learned about the food chain, the effects of its interruption, and they've learned that the plural of mouse is not mouses, but mice. Maybe you've never even paid attention to yourself doing this. But, believe it or not, you are teaching language much more effectively than any textbook (or teacher) ever could. Maybe your child won't remember that exact word the very first time (it just depends on their age). But over time, you will notice that the child naturally starts calling mice "mice"... not "mouses". If you want to, you can tell your child, (Like I did with this particular conversation with Savannah about mouses :), "Honey, the plural of mouse is mice... not mouses." And then continue to explain that plural means more than one. But even if you don't, they will come across that information sometime in their lives, and recognize it as the "educational" reason they say mice instead of mouses.
Well, that fulfills my blogging desire for the night. I wish I could write down every "educational" thing we discuss/do in everyday life... but alas.. I am tired. Good night!
Sunday, September 03, 2006
Kids growing up doesn't have to mean growing away from you!
I just wanted to blog a little about the ties that bind us to our kids. Tonight, I played Texas Hold Em' alongside my 10 year old, Jesse, and I was amazed at how he has soaked in all the poker terminology, and how to play in such a short time. His desire to hang out with his family is a major contributor to his desire to learn the games we play. We started out with 7 players betting $3 each. Jesse took 4th place in his first real betting game. This didn't win him any money, but I was so proud of how he handled himself, and was such a pro. He certainly played better, and understood more than I did in my first game!
I ended up taking 2nd for maybe the first time ever, and I got back the $6 I'd put in to cover Jesse and myself. I plan on taking him to Starbucks and enjoying the winnings with him for his hard efforts. He was up until around 2AM, outlasting 3 adults!
He says that Grandpa wants him to start playing with us whenever we do, and I think it's a great idea! Odds are a big part of poker, and how many 5th graders understand odds all that well? Or, just the life lesson of becoming cautious, not expecting gambling to pan out big bucks all the time. He'll learn to become realistic about how much money he gambles REAL fast!
Anyway, besides all the educational aspects, I just really enjoyed hanging out with my two older boys tonight. For really the first time, they joined in on the adults games, instead of watching a movie or playing with their cousins, or a video game.
Travis played a few practice hands of poker, and he sat on my lap and watched the real game for quite a while too. I'm sure it won't be long before he's where Jesse is now.
The other game that they played with all of us is called Mafia. It's basically a strategic lying game. It involves A LOT of communication, and teaches you NOT to be backwards/shy.
It's a lot of fun.
We had some family down from Pennsylvania this weekend for Labor Day, 5 adults, and one baby (almost a year old). They came in on Friday, and are staying until Sunday night. I am so happy that our family is big on hanging out with each other. My kids are growing up in such a rich supportive emotional environment. I treasure that. As well as the fact that most everyone in the family, even the extended members from Pa., are born again Christians.
All together this weekend, the whole group that was hanging out with each other consisted of 9 families represented (not every member got to come), by 14 adults ranging in age from 22 to 53, and 12 children ranging in ages from 5 months to 10 years old... not including myself and Carrie being pregnant at 20 and 15 weeks along respectively. Talk about a range of socialization!
I just thought it was so cool to see my 8 and a half year old, and 10 year old boys playing games and interacting with all of us adults, and having a great time doing so. It's not only great seeing them starting to grow up, it's wonderful knowing that they are growing up WITH us, NOT away from us.
I ended up taking 2nd for maybe the first time ever, and I got back the $6 I'd put in to cover Jesse and myself. I plan on taking him to Starbucks and enjoying the winnings with him for his hard efforts. He was up until around 2AM, outlasting 3 adults!
He says that Grandpa wants him to start playing with us whenever we do, and I think it's a great idea! Odds are a big part of poker, and how many 5th graders understand odds all that well? Or, just the life lesson of becoming cautious, not expecting gambling to pan out big bucks all the time. He'll learn to become realistic about how much money he gambles REAL fast!
Anyway, besides all the educational aspects, I just really enjoyed hanging out with my two older boys tonight. For really the first time, they joined in on the adults games, instead of watching a movie or playing with their cousins, or a video game.
Travis played a few practice hands of poker, and he sat on my lap and watched the real game for quite a while too. I'm sure it won't be long before he's where Jesse is now.
The other game that they played with all of us is called Mafia. It's basically a strategic lying game. It involves A LOT of communication, and teaches you NOT to be backwards/shy.
It's a lot of fun.
We had some family down from Pennsylvania this weekend for Labor Day, 5 adults, and one baby (almost a year old). They came in on Friday, and are staying until Sunday night. I am so happy that our family is big on hanging out with each other. My kids are growing up in such a rich supportive emotional environment. I treasure that. As well as the fact that most everyone in the family, even the extended members from Pa., are born again Christians.
All together this weekend, the whole group that was hanging out with each other consisted of 9 families represented (not every member got to come), by 14 adults ranging in age from 22 to 53, and 12 children ranging in ages from 5 months to 10 years old... not including myself and Carrie being pregnant at 20 and 15 weeks along respectively. Talk about a range of socialization!
I just thought it was so cool to see my 8 and a half year old, and 10 year old boys playing games and interacting with all of us adults, and having a great time doing so. It's not only great seeing them starting to grow up, it's wonderful knowing that they are growing up WITH us, NOT away from us.
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Freedom of Choice
August 27, 2006
Yesterday I started reading more from my John Taylor Gatto book, The Underground History of American Education, and something he said in it rang true to me. It’s one of those things that have been laying around as basic unformed knowledge in my head, and John put it into words.
I’ll paraphrase him, in reference to our society’s modern route to success, here:
What is most deceptive….. is the introduction of an apparently libertarian note of free choice into the equation. Modern society’s people are encouraged to self-start and to proceed on what appears to be an independent course. But upon closer inspection, that course is always toward a centrally prescribed social goal, never towards personal solutions to life’s dilemmas. Freedom of choice in this formulation arises from the FEELING that you have freedom, NOT from its actual possession.
This rings true to me in that most people’s plan for life consists of going to preschool, kindergarten, elementary, middle, then high school, then on to college (and sometimes more than just the 4 years) to get their "successful" start in life. Their success being based on and expected to come from their “education”.
Where is the freedom of choice in this equation? If someone chooses to veer from this plan, say, not sending their child to preschool, or a young adult choosing NOT to go to college, how often is this looked down on?
How many times have we seen TV shows where going to school is a given, and going to college is the high prize you receive if you work hard in school "in order to succeed"?
I watched a show the other night, and saw a girl in her high school years, probably her senior year, opening a letter from the college she chose to apply to. The emotional tide ran high. Her dad stood by her offering his emotional support and approval of his daughter, whether it was an acceptance letter or not. (Of course their preference was that it would be an acceptance letter.) And oh the rapture I saw on her face when she read that the college was pleased to tell her that she had been accepted into it’s halls for furthering her education. You would think she had just been told that her family would be taken care of for the rest of their lives! Never to be in poverty!
But isn’t that what the colleges advertise? Isn’t that the basic reason people are pushed to go there? Don’t kids feel the pressure to financially succeed from elementary school on? And don’t they think that the best route to take is college?
And what is the general consensus if you have NOT gone to college? Or worse yet, if you’ve ONLY got a GED, or heaven forbid, never finished school? You are somehow considered to be less intelligent than the general populace, doomed to a life of servitude, most likely in the food service or lower end of the construction business, right?
But what is the reality? Are these perceptions based on the individual at all? Their actual knowledge or more important their character? No. They only take into account whether or not the person had completed a prescribed curriculum (government curriculum for the most part) for a certain number of years. And it is the same general knowledge that each and every other person has who has completed the same amount of “education”. I encourage you to really think about this. Where has the bulk of your knowledge that you use day to day come from? Has it been gleaned from living everyday life? Learning to open a checking account, Learning financial responsibility, Learning to discipline yourself to do what you need to, not always what you want to..... Learning unselfishness, Learning to get along with people of different ages, sizes, races, PERSONALITIES, etc... are these things that you learn in school?
Again. Where is the individualism? Where is the freedom of choice? How has America, the land of opportunity, become, America, the land of college debt? How has this benefited our society as a whole? Are a lot more people a lot more successful? Who is benefiting from this new regime?
I will teach my children not to base their idea of success on the world’s. I want them to realize that their “education” is just a part of their life (whether this comes from discussion, reading, playing, or even “formal” education if they should need college for their chosen occupations. I will impress upon them that following God’s will in their lives runs far superior to accumulating the world’s knowledge. And living meaningful lives means spending time with their families as opposed to spending time “climbing the ladder” OR as opposed to "finding themselves" OR doing what they "feel" is right.
Personally, I am for real freedom of choice. My children will be encouraged to lead fulfilling lives regardless of what form of education they choose, whether it be “formal” or informal. I will not imprison them in a certain building for 8 hours each weekday, and 2 hours of homework a night. I will not make them complete someone else's curriculum and tell them that this is their only route to educating themselves. There are all kinds of resources for learning. Reading takes time. Asking questions and listening to someone about an interest takes time. Working takes time. If they were in school, they would have only a fraction of the time to learn that they have now. Now they have the freedom to choose their education. Their freedom to live life is actual, not just perceived.
Yesterday I started reading more from my John Taylor Gatto book, The Underground History of American Education, and something he said in it rang true to me. It’s one of those things that have been laying around as basic unformed knowledge in my head, and John put it into words.
I’ll paraphrase him, in reference to our society’s modern route to success, here:
What is most deceptive….. is the introduction of an apparently libertarian note of free choice into the equation. Modern society’s people are encouraged to self-start and to proceed on what appears to be an independent course. But upon closer inspection, that course is always toward a centrally prescribed social goal, never towards personal solutions to life’s dilemmas. Freedom of choice in this formulation arises from the FEELING that you have freedom, NOT from its actual possession.
This rings true to me in that most people’s plan for life consists of going to preschool, kindergarten, elementary, middle, then high school, then on to college (and sometimes more than just the 4 years) to get their "successful" start in life. Their success being based on and expected to come from their “education”.
Where is the freedom of choice in this equation? If someone chooses to veer from this plan, say, not sending their child to preschool, or a young adult choosing NOT to go to college, how often is this looked down on?
How many times have we seen TV shows where going to school is a given, and going to college is the high prize you receive if you work hard in school "in order to succeed"?
I watched a show the other night, and saw a girl in her high school years, probably her senior year, opening a letter from the college she chose to apply to. The emotional tide ran high. Her dad stood by her offering his emotional support and approval of his daughter, whether it was an acceptance letter or not. (Of course their preference was that it would be an acceptance letter.) And oh the rapture I saw on her face when she read that the college was pleased to tell her that she had been accepted into it’s halls for furthering her education. You would think she had just been told that her family would be taken care of for the rest of their lives! Never to be in poverty!
But isn’t that what the colleges advertise? Isn’t that the basic reason people are pushed to go there? Don’t kids feel the pressure to financially succeed from elementary school on? And don’t they think that the best route to take is college?
And what is the general consensus if you have NOT gone to college? Or worse yet, if you’ve ONLY got a GED, or heaven forbid, never finished school? You are somehow considered to be less intelligent than the general populace, doomed to a life of servitude, most likely in the food service or lower end of the construction business, right?
But what is the reality? Are these perceptions based on the individual at all? Their actual knowledge or more important their character? No. They only take into account whether or not the person had completed a prescribed curriculum (government curriculum for the most part) for a certain number of years. And it is the same general knowledge that each and every other person has who has completed the same amount of “education”. I encourage you to really think about this. Where has the bulk of your knowledge that you use day to day come from? Has it been gleaned from living everyday life? Learning to open a checking account, Learning financial responsibility, Learning to discipline yourself to do what you need to, not always what you want to..... Learning unselfishness, Learning to get along with people of different ages, sizes, races, PERSONALITIES, etc... are these things that you learn in school?
Again. Where is the individualism? Where is the freedom of choice? How has America, the land of opportunity, become, America, the land of college debt? How has this benefited our society as a whole? Are a lot more people a lot more successful? Who is benefiting from this new regime?
I will teach my children not to base their idea of success on the world’s. I want them to realize that their “education” is just a part of their life (whether this comes from discussion, reading, playing, or even “formal” education if they should need college for their chosen occupations. I will impress upon them that following God’s will in their lives runs far superior to accumulating the world’s knowledge. And living meaningful lives means spending time with their families as opposed to spending time “climbing the ladder” OR as opposed to "finding themselves" OR doing what they "feel" is right.
Personally, I am for real freedom of choice. My children will be encouraged to lead fulfilling lives regardless of what form of education they choose, whether it be “formal” or informal. I will not imprison them in a certain building for 8 hours each weekday, and 2 hours of homework a night. I will not make them complete someone else's curriculum and tell them that this is their only route to educating themselves. There are all kinds of resources for learning. Reading takes time. Asking questions and listening to someone about an interest takes time. Working takes time. If they were in school, they would have only a fraction of the time to learn that they have now. Now they have the freedom to choose their education. Their freedom to live life is actual, not just perceived.
Sunday, August 20, 2006
"Let the teachers do their jobs!"
I was flipping through channels on the radio the other day on the way to the store, and I happened to overhear Mike Gallagher talking about parents going with their kids to their first day of school. I guess some school districts are encouraging this because they are trying to encourage parental involvement with their kids education.
Mike was getting all huffy saying that parents should just butt out of their kids school lives, and "let them go through the rite of passage of going to the first day of school alone".
He had lots of people calling in to agree with him, mostly teachers. Mike had the nerve to say, "Why don't these parents just let the teachers do their jobs?!"
Since when did training our children become the job of strangers? Doesn't God plainly tell us in His Word that we are to train up our children? Does their training end at 5 years old when it's "time" to send them off to kindergarten?
I'm sorry, but just because the world says that I should give my children to someone else to train (including other Christians at a school) does not mean that I am going to. And I challenge all Christians who believe that the Word of God is good for instruction to research this subject! I believe that the Bible's instructions regarding our children cannot be carried out fully if we are not with our children for the 40 hours a week school takes away from us. How are we to mold their character if we do not have the every day chances to do so? How can you mold a child in the evening hours between homework, supper, and bedtime? Why would we give our children such a disadvantage in life as to be seperated from us?
The worldly philosophy of quality vs. quantity time is a farce. As parents, especially as mothers, we have the greatest amount of time and influence with our children. We should use it wisely. We need to step back and re-examine our culture's way of raising its children. Does sending your children away for 40 hours/week allow the time for cultivating a deep and meaningful relationship with our children? Does it allow for us to impart God's wisdom and values in a real life setting at the time that they occur? Does it allow for us to correct our children when they need it? At the moment they cop an attitude towards someone, or something that didn't go their way?
Each one of us, of course, is responsible for our own lives, and must find the answer to these questions for ourselves. But I encourage you to research this! Look on blueletterbible.org for the words children, train, teach, etc... Decide for yourself. Romans 14:5 says "Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind."
Whose job is it to teach our children?
Mike was getting all huffy saying that parents should just butt out of their kids school lives, and "let them go through the rite of passage of going to the first day of school alone".
He had lots of people calling in to agree with him, mostly teachers. Mike had the nerve to say, "Why don't these parents just let the teachers do their jobs?!"
Since when did training our children become the job of strangers? Doesn't God plainly tell us in His Word that we are to train up our children? Does their training end at 5 years old when it's "time" to send them off to kindergarten?
I'm sorry, but just because the world says that I should give my children to someone else to train (including other Christians at a school) does not mean that I am going to. And I challenge all Christians who believe that the Word of God is good for instruction to research this subject! I believe that the Bible's instructions regarding our children cannot be carried out fully if we are not with our children for the 40 hours a week school takes away from us. How are we to mold their character if we do not have the every day chances to do so? How can you mold a child in the evening hours between homework, supper, and bedtime? Why would we give our children such a disadvantage in life as to be seperated from us?
The worldly philosophy of quality vs. quantity time is a farce. As parents, especially as mothers, we have the greatest amount of time and influence with our children. We should use it wisely. We need to step back and re-examine our culture's way of raising its children. Does sending your children away for 40 hours/week allow the time for cultivating a deep and meaningful relationship with our children? Does it allow for us to impart God's wisdom and values in a real life setting at the time that they occur? Does it allow for us to correct our children when they need it? At the moment they cop an attitude towards someone, or something that didn't go their way?
Each one of us, of course, is responsible for our own lives, and must find the answer to these questions for ourselves. But I encourage you to research this! Look on blueletterbible.org for the words children, train, teach, etc... Decide for yourself. Romans 14:5 says "Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind."
Whose job is it to teach our children?
Friday, August 18, 2006
Freedom of Thought: A Human Right
I got this partial quote from an email sent to me from my Homefires email list. It is a quote from John Holt, who is screwed up in some areas, but has some things so right. I like his thoughts below:
"No human right, except the right to life itself, is more fundamental than
this. A person's freedom of learning is part of his freedom of thought, even
more basic than his freedom of speech. If we take form someone his right to
decide what he will be curious about, we destroy his freedom of thought. We
say, in effect, you must think not about what interests and concerns you,
but about what interests and concerns us.
We might call this the right of curiosity, the right to ask whatever
questions are most important to us. As adults, we assume that we have the
right to decide what does or does not interest us, what we will look into
and what we will leave alone. We take this right largely for granted, cannot
imagine that it might be taken away from us. Indeed, as far as I know, it
has never been written into any body of law. even the writers of our
Constitution did not mention it. They thought it was enough to guarantee
citizens the freedom of speech and the freedom to spread their ideas as
widely as they wished and could. it did not occur to them that even the most
tyrannical government would try to control people's minds, what they thought
and knew. That idea would come later, under the benevolent guise of
compulsory universal education."
"No human right, except the right to life itself, is more fundamental than
this. A person's freedom of learning is part of his freedom of thought, even
more basic than his freedom of speech. If we take form someone his right to
decide what he will be curious about, we destroy his freedom of thought. We
say, in effect, you must think not about what interests and concerns you,
but about what interests and concerns us.
We might call this the right of curiosity, the right to ask whatever
questions are most important to us. As adults, we assume that we have the
right to decide what does or does not interest us, what we will look into
and what we will leave alone. We take this right largely for granted, cannot
imagine that it might be taken away from us. Indeed, as far as I know, it
has never been written into any body of law. even the writers of our
Constitution did not mention it. They thought it was enough to guarantee
citizens the freedom of speech and the freedom to spread their ideas as
widely as they wished and could. it did not occur to them that even the most
tyrannical government would try to control people's minds, what they thought
and knew. That idea would come later, under the benevolent guise of
compulsory universal education."
I'm Bored!!
Today, one of our neighbor friends came over to visit. Travis was asking them how long until school starts, and don't they want to stay home?
The person replied, "No, I want to go to school."
Why? He asked.
"Because, I'm bored." they replied.
I had heard this same exchange of words, a few days ago, when my mom was here to hear it as well, and I commented to her, "Kids get bored because they are used to being spoon fed things to do. Everything is planned for them. They have no idea how to direct their own lives."
I thought about this again today, as I heard this person repeat their comment on boredom at home being a reason for wanting to go back to school. She/he is used to someone else directing his/her life for them, I said to Travis, "They are used to someone giving them things to do, so they don't get bored..." Then, I turned to the friend, and said, "Right?" They nodded, but I'm not sure they fully grasped what I was saying. I don't know if they knew that I meant it was a negative thing or not, but maybe someday they'll reflect on it. I don't know, maybe it was not a nice way to put it. I'm sure my MIL could have come up with a nicer way to say it, but sometimes I get too zealous and can't shut up. That's why I have this blog! :) It's an outlet for my thoughts.
So, anyway, I thought back to a shirt I'd seen this friend wearing at one of my kids birthday parties. It said, "Bored of Education", you know, a play on the words "Board of Education"... but it spoke volumes to me. When I thought about it, I thought, what is education anyway? Is education really what most people think of it as? Going to school for 12 to 16 years out of your life? Can't you get just as good if not better an education by living life, and pursuing your interests? I answer a resounding "Yes!" And you don't get bored of education, because life IS an education.
I thought about that statement, "I'm bored", and I realized that it's been a long while since I've heard that out of my kids! It took them a while to get used to making their own schedules, so the "I'm bored's" didn't stop immmediately after beginning unschooling. I'd say it took about 8 months for them to stop saying it. Even if you are doing "school at home" the traditional way, you are telling your kids what their interests should be, and making "education" a packaged, time limited item. Then you say, "Let's go to the library 'just for fun' and get some books you like!" Isn't that a time of education in itself, though? Why do we have to be made to be 'bored of education'?
I'm happy to see that my kids now for the most part are responsible for their own hours in the day. I don't hear, "I'm bored, there's nothing to do!" because they are used to choosing how to spend their time. There is no time limited or labeled "free time". They are kids! Most of their time is free! And their education is not suffering in the least because of it. In fact it is flourishing.
The person replied, "No, I want to go to school."
Why? He asked.
"Because, I'm bored." they replied.
I had heard this same exchange of words, a few days ago, when my mom was here to hear it as well, and I commented to her, "Kids get bored because they are used to being spoon fed things to do. Everything is planned for them. They have no idea how to direct their own lives."
I thought about this again today, as I heard this person repeat their comment on boredom at home being a reason for wanting to go back to school. She/he is used to someone else directing his/her life for them, I said to Travis, "They are used to someone giving them things to do, so they don't get bored..." Then, I turned to the friend, and said, "Right?" They nodded, but I'm not sure they fully grasped what I was saying. I don't know if they knew that I meant it was a negative thing or not, but maybe someday they'll reflect on it. I don't know, maybe it was not a nice way to put it. I'm sure my MIL could have come up with a nicer way to say it, but sometimes I get too zealous and can't shut up. That's why I have this blog! :) It's an outlet for my thoughts.
So, anyway, I thought back to a shirt I'd seen this friend wearing at one of my kids birthday parties. It said, "Bored of Education", you know, a play on the words "Board of Education"... but it spoke volumes to me. When I thought about it, I thought, what is education anyway? Is education really what most people think of it as? Going to school for 12 to 16 years out of your life? Can't you get just as good if not better an education by living life, and pursuing your interests? I answer a resounding "Yes!" And you don't get bored of education, because life IS an education.
I thought about that statement, "I'm bored", and I realized that it's been a long while since I've heard that out of my kids! It took them a while to get used to making their own schedules, so the "I'm bored's" didn't stop immmediately after beginning unschooling. I'd say it took about 8 months for them to stop saying it. Even if you are doing "school at home" the traditional way, you are telling your kids what their interests should be, and making "education" a packaged, time limited item. Then you say, "Let's go to the library 'just for fun' and get some books you like!" Isn't that a time of education in itself, though? Why do we have to be made to be 'bored of education'?
I'm happy to see that my kids now for the most part are responsible for their own hours in the day. I don't hear, "I'm bored, there's nothing to do!" because they are used to choosing how to spend their time. There is no time limited or labeled "free time". They are kids! Most of their time is free! And their education is not suffering in the least because of it. In fact it is flourishing.
Saturday, August 12, 2006
What about socialization?? (My favorite topic!)
I used to be one of those people who thought that "socialization" really did mean that it was critical for our children to interact with kids their own age on a regular basis. When I first started homeschooling, and a conversation about it with someone would start in the "socialization" direction, I would respond with the typical, "Well, we have them in gymnastics classes once a week, and they play with their neighborhood friends ALL THE TIME, and then there's church friends, and cousins their age... etc, etc,...."
What do you think about when you hear the word socialization in reference to children? You probably think, like most people do, that it means that a child can stand up for him/herself in a group situation, right? The child has good self esteem, and can play well with kids their own age. They aren't shy or backwards, or hiding behind their parents, right? Sometimes a "socialized" child is one who is expected to be downright obnoxiously opinionated, right? At least they aren't that sickly white "never seen the sun", always in the house at the table doing bookwork, homeschool nerd, right? Socialization is a good thing, right? That's what I used to think to! Please click on this link, or copy and paste into your address bar, for the dictionary's definition of socialization.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/socialization
I was shocked to learn that what I'd heard in some homeschool book I read a long time ago was actually true! I figured it was some biased for homeschooling definition they dug up or made up!
But just googling "dictionary" and clicking on the top choice, and then pasting the word socialization in to the word bar, I came up with more/most of the definition of socialization.
Basically socialization means that your kid/s are:
1.Placed under government, or group ownership control
2.Adopt the current behaviour patterns of the surrounding culture
3.Learn interpersonal and interactional skills that are in conformity with the values of one's society.
4.The socialization of children to the norms of their culture" [syn: socialisation, acculturation, enculturation]
These are real defenitions of socialization. Don't believe me? click on the link!
There is only one definition out of the six available there that refers to what I think MOST people think that socialization means:
v. intr.: To take part in social activities.
I don't know about you, but I don't WANT my child to be socialized in the way the dictionary defines it! I mean the part about social activities is ok, but what about the rest?
I don't WANT my kids to adopt societies ways or values! OR be under government/group ownership control! I want my kids to be thinkers for themselves! Not only in business, and morals, and spiritual beliefs, but in many other ways as well. Anyone who has met my kids for the first time, usually compliments me on how polite they are, or how well behaved. They are mature for their ages when compared to most of the selfish kids in today's society. And that comes from their training. The "socialization" that they have received from us.
Whenever I see my 10 year old just go right up to another kid, and say "Hi! How are you?" and strike up a conversation about Pokemon, or X-box, or anything else that he finds they have in common, I smile at how "socialized" he is. Or my 8 year old son runs off from us into a crowd of 150 people yelling, "Don' worry Mom, I'll find my team!" I picture how some people think homeschoolers hide behind Momma's skirts. I smile, and then laugh out loud, and then have to comment to my husband how much I enjoy homeschooling, and proving people wrong. He laughs at me. He doesn't really care what people think. Maybe someday I'll reach that point. But for now, I can always blog about socialization!
Now, entering our 6th year of homeschooling, and reaching the end of our first year of our way of unschooling, I love seeing my children blossoming socially. They interact with ages 0 to 83 (I'm not sure they've ever met anyone older than that), in the same ways. Looking them straight in the eyes, respectfully, and talking in full sentences (no mumbling). It would not occur to them to treat someone who is not their age any differently. Never being in school, THEY'VE NEVER BEEN SOCIALIZED! :)
What do you think about when you hear the word socialization in reference to children? You probably think, like most people do, that it means that a child can stand up for him/herself in a group situation, right? The child has good self esteem, and can play well with kids their own age. They aren't shy or backwards, or hiding behind their parents, right? Sometimes a "socialized" child is one who is expected to be downright obnoxiously opinionated, right? At least they aren't that sickly white "never seen the sun", always in the house at the table doing bookwork, homeschool nerd, right? Socialization is a good thing, right? That's what I used to think to! Please click on this link, or copy and paste into your address bar, for the dictionary's definition of socialization.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/socialization
I was shocked to learn that what I'd heard in some homeschool book I read a long time ago was actually true! I figured it was some biased for homeschooling definition they dug up or made up!
But just googling "dictionary" and clicking on the top choice, and then pasting the word socialization in to the word bar, I came up with more/most of the definition of socialization.
Basically socialization means that your kid/s are:
1.Placed under government, or group ownership control
2.Adopt the current behaviour patterns of the surrounding culture
3.Learn interpersonal and interactional skills that are in conformity with the values of one's society.
4.The socialization of children to the norms of their culture" [syn: socialisation, acculturation, enculturation]
These are real defenitions of socialization. Don't believe me? click on the link!
There is only one definition out of the six available there that refers to what I think MOST people think that socialization means:
v. intr.: To take part in social activities.
I don't know about you, but I don't WANT my child to be socialized in the way the dictionary defines it! I mean the part about social activities is ok, but what about the rest?
I don't WANT my kids to adopt societies ways or values! OR be under government/group ownership control! I want my kids to be thinkers for themselves! Not only in business, and morals, and spiritual beliefs, but in many other ways as well. Anyone who has met my kids for the first time, usually compliments me on how polite they are, or how well behaved. They are mature for their ages when compared to most of the selfish kids in today's society. And that comes from their training. The "socialization" that they have received from us.
Whenever I see my 10 year old just go right up to another kid, and say "Hi! How are you?" and strike up a conversation about Pokemon, or X-box, or anything else that he finds they have in common, I smile at how "socialized" he is. Or my 8 year old son runs off from us into a crowd of 150 people yelling, "Don' worry Mom, I'll find my team!" I picture how some people think homeschoolers hide behind Momma's skirts. I smile, and then laugh out loud, and then have to comment to my husband how much I enjoy homeschooling, and proving people wrong. He laughs at me. He doesn't really care what people think. Maybe someday I'll reach that point. But for now, I can always blog about socialization!
Now, entering our 6th year of homeschooling, and reaching the end of our first year of our way of unschooling, I love seeing my children blossoming socially. They interact with ages 0 to 83 (I'm not sure they've ever met anyone older than that), in the same ways. Looking them straight in the eyes, respectfully, and talking in full sentences (no mumbling). It would not occur to them to treat someone who is not their age any differently. Never being in school, THEY'VE NEVER BEEN SOCIALIZED! :)
Learning through gaming! The Pokemon card game
Tomorrow is another Pokemon free play at Boba's Coffee. We are usually there from 3 to 6pm when we go, and the kids have a blast. The owners are weirdo freaks like us! They have 6 kids under the age of 13, and they homeschool. They unschooled for quite a while, then gave in to the pressure of "what if they aren't getting what they need to learn?" with their older kids, and started using Ohdela. Now, Christie (the mom) is realizing that it's not what she wanted after all, and is heavily considering unschooling again.
Anyway, back to the subject matter. There are a few kids in the "Boba" family (that's not actually their real name), who like to play the Pokemon card game. There's an 11 year old girl, and a 10 year old boy. I'm not sure if there's another 9 year old girl or not. But that's the extent of people my kids' ages that actually play the game. The other people are in their late teens to early twenties. There are about 5 regulars who come on Wednesdays to the free play, and one of them was 3rd best in the state of Ohio a few years ago! They are all very polite people who enjoy getting newbies into the game, and will patiently play for hours on end with my kids.
All the while, my youngest two get to play with Christie's youngest two girls who are 4 and 6 approximately.
Savannah, my 6 year old, Travis my 8 year old, and Jesse my 10 year old all play the actual tournament rules. They know them in varying degrees according to their ages.
Their are quite a few things that I think are useful that my kids get out of playing this card game:
1. They have FUN!
2. They socialize (participate in a social event) with ages 4 to 31 (including their dad).
3.They improve their reading skills. Savannah, who just got out of Grandma Schooling's kindergarten, has greatly improved her reading through these cards. She is learning the meanings of, and how to read all sorts of bigger words like: Defending, Poisoned, Paralyzed, Supporter, Switch, Benched, Opponent, Attached, Active, Damaged, Recycle, Intimidating, Luring, Agility, etc, etc..
4.They improve their math skills. They have to do Subtraction, Addition, and Multiplication in their heads. Some examples are: 70 minus 40, 40 times 2, 40 plus 20, 10 times almost any number, 50 minus 20, etc., etc....
5.They spend quality time with their dad playing this game.
6.They spend quality time with each other! I feel this is just as important as spending time with their Dad and I. The other morning, I woke up, and all 4 of my older kids, ages, 4, 6, 8, and 10 were playing Pokemon on their bedroom floor. They are learning to treat their younger siblings with respect, as well as learning patience with others through teaching their younger siblings this game.
The life lesson benefits that they learn from this game are actually much more important to me than the "educational ones" of math and reading. Learning to treat others with respect and patience regardless of their age is something I highly regard. Spending time having fun with their dad, and each other is also something I regard highly.
7.Meeting new people is good for them too, and this is one of the many side benefits of playing this game.
8.Besides all that, I get to spend some time in conversation with another mom who has similar values to myself!
I used to think that Pokemon was just another mind numbing TV show/game. Seeing my kids participate in it has changed that view drastically! Learning through living.... I'm lovin' it!
Meeting and interacting with people of all ages. Practising Math and reading.... even at 4 and 6 years old.
Anyway, back to the subject matter. There are a few kids in the "Boba" family (that's not actually their real name), who like to play the Pokemon card game. There's an 11 year old girl, and a 10 year old boy. I'm not sure if there's another 9 year old girl or not. But that's the extent of people my kids' ages that actually play the game. The other people are in their late teens to early twenties. There are about 5 regulars who come on Wednesdays to the free play, and one of them was 3rd best in the state of Ohio a few years ago! They are all very polite people who enjoy getting newbies into the game, and will patiently play for hours on end with my kids.
All the while, my youngest two get to play with Christie's youngest two girls who are 4 and 6 approximately.
Savannah, my 6 year old, Travis my 8 year old, and Jesse my 10 year old all play the actual tournament rules. They know them in varying degrees according to their ages.
Their are quite a few things that I think are useful that my kids get out of playing this card game:
1. They have FUN!
2. They socialize (participate in a social event) with ages 4 to 31 (including their dad).
3.They improve their reading skills. Savannah, who just got out of Grandma Schooling's kindergarten, has greatly improved her reading through these cards. She is learning the meanings of, and how to read all sorts of bigger words like: Defending, Poisoned, Paralyzed, Supporter, Switch, Benched, Opponent, Attached, Active, Damaged, Recycle, Intimidating, Luring, Agility, etc, etc..
4.They improve their math skills. They have to do Subtraction, Addition, and Multiplication in their heads. Some examples are: 70 minus 40, 40 times 2, 40 plus 20, 10 times almost any number, 50 minus 20, etc., etc....
5.They spend quality time with their dad playing this game.
6.They spend quality time with each other! I feel this is just as important as spending time with their Dad and I. The other morning, I woke up, and all 4 of my older kids, ages, 4, 6, 8, and 10 were playing Pokemon on their bedroom floor. They are learning to treat their younger siblings with respect, as well as learning patience with others through teaching their younger siblings this game.
The life lesson benefits that they learn from this game are actually much more important to me than the "educational ones" of math and reading. Learning to treat others with respect and patience regardless of their age is something I highly regard. Spending time having fun with their dad, and each other is also something I regard highly.
7.Meeting new people is good for them too, and this is one of the many side benefits of playing this game.
8.Besides all that, I get to spend some time in conversation with another mom who has similar values to myself!
I used to think that Pokemon was just another mind numbing TV show/game. Seeing my kids participate in it has changed that view drastically! Learning through living.... I'm lovin' it!
Meeting and interacting with people of all ages. Practising Math and reading.... even at 4 and 6 years old.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
My definition of "Unschooling"
I thought it would be a good idea to explain what my definition of "unschooling" is, as there are a lot of people who define it differently than myself.
I define unschooling as the process of learning naturally, without the need of school. Naturally being how God intended us to learn. Without prethought lesson plans, without someone imposing their interests on us and demanding that we memorize facts about it.
We learn best when we are interested in something. This learning can take place in any format, as long as the learner is interested!
Someone commented to my husband and I recently, "Isn't this against your educational philosophy?" We were at a Metro Park at night to hear someone tell us about the stars, their constellations, and let us use their telescope to see them. Kind of a really informal lecture format. You didn't have to sit and listen, you could talk quietly without bothering anyone, and you were there by choice.
But this person thought that because we have said we are "unschooling" that we "don't want to be taught by anyone".... This is inaccurate. We want our children to learn through any means that keeps them interested. This can be through watching TV, reading library books, talking with a family member (a lot of the time that'd be me, my husband, one of their aunts/uncles, and/or a grandparent), or any other person they meet, and they do meet a lot of people of all different ages. They can learn through playing video games, computer games, board games, cooking, baking, observing animals and bugs, seasons and weather changing, and interactive play with each other and their friends, (I'll write more on that in another post.), There are many others ways of learning I'm sure no one could think of all at one time.
All these things are done in everyday life. Not all at once, not compressed into a certain period of "time for learning". Unschooling (learning) for a child is as natural as breathing. Unschooling for a parent, is just being a parent! Helping your child learn what he would like to, and guiding them when they need it.
Another one of the great ways that a kid learns is when their parent is interested in something. The child sees the parent pursuing their interest, and they get curious. Especially when the parent shares what they are learning. We all get excited when we find something particularly interesting, and we want to share, right? Well, that excitement catches the kid's interest. At least for a small period where you share what is exciting you, and they listen for your sake. And if it catches their interest as well, then they may ask questions which lead to more research. If it doesn't interest them, they can go off and do what does interest them. And then later, if the subject comes up again, they have been introduced to it, and the parent can say, "Remember when I was interested in such and such, and I told you about it?"
I have so many examples of how my and my husband's interests have sparked long and interesting conversations with our kids that I guess I'll have to do another post just about that.
Sticking to the current post's subject though, I would like to clarify one of the larger parts of unschooling that I define as different from a lot of unschoolers, especially the radical ones.
I do not believe in the philosophy of child led child-rearing. God put us here as parents to love, nurture, and TRAIN our children. Sometimes this includes having them do things they are not at all interested in doing because they cannot see the good in doing so. Sometimes this means that they need correction and punishment. This also means that they learn responsibility through helping with the housework, indoors and out, helping with their siblings, etc.
So, in a nutshell, to me, unschooling means life without school. It has nothing to do with our parenting style as far as discipline goes, but other than that, it has EVERYTHING to do with it. We are not parents who sit on the sideline, and ask a few questions about our kids homework, because we haven't been with them for the past 7 hours. We are not just the kids' chaffuer to sports events where they hang out with their friends. We are not like the parents I heard about the other day: A recent study shows that most parents actually spend just 30 seconds of quality time with their children each day!
We define our unschooling lifestyle as watching over, helping with, and just plain being aware of most everything our children learn.
They are with us A LOT. We like it that way! And so far, that's what unschooling means to me!
I define unschooling as the process of learning naturally, without the need of school. Naturally being how God intended us to learn. Without prethought lesson plans, without someone imposing their interests on us and demanding that we memorize facts about it.
We learn best when we are interested in something. This learning can take place in any format, as long as the learner is interested!
Someone commented to my husband and I recently, "Isn't this against your educational philosophy?" We were at a Metro Park at night to hear someone tell us about the stars, their constellations, and let us use their telescope to see them. Kind of a really informal lecture format. You didn't have to sit and listen, you could talk quietly without bothering anyone, and you were there by choice.
But this person thought that because we have said we are "unschooling" that we "don't want to be taught by anyone".... This is inaccurate. We want our children to learn through any means that keeps them interested. This can be through watching TV, reading library books, talking with a family member (a lot of the time that'd be me, my husband, one of their aunts/uncles, and/or a grandparent), or any other person they meet, and they do meet a lot of people of all different ages. They can learn through playing video games, computer games, board games, cooking, baking, observing animals and bugs, seasons and weather changing, and interactive play with each other and their friends, (I'll write more on that in another post.), There are many others ways of learning I'm sure no one could think of all at one time.
All these things are done in everyday life. Not all at once, not compressed into a certain period of "time for learning". Unschooling (learning) for a child is as natural as breathing. Unschooling for a parent, is just being a parent! Helping your child learn what he would like to, and guiding them when they need it.
Another one of the great ways that a kid learns is when their parent is interested in something. The child sees the parent pursuing their interest, and they get curious. Especially when the parent shares what they are learning. We all get excited when we find something particularly interesting, and we want to share, right? Well, that excitement catches the kid's interest. At least for a small period where you share what is exciting you, and they listen for your sake. And if it catches their interest as well, then they may ask questions which lead to more research. If it doesn't interest them, they can go off and do what does interest them. And then later, if the subject comes up again, they have been introduced to it, and the parent can say, "Remember when I was interested in such and such, and I told you about it?"
I have so many examples of how my and my husband's interests have sparked long and interesting conversations with our kids that I guess I'll have to do another post just about that.
Sticking to the current post's subject though, I would like to clarify one of the larger parts of unschooling that I define as different from a lot of unschoolers, especially the radical ones.
I do not believe in the philosophy of child led child-rearing. God put us here as parents to love, nurture, and TRAIN our children. Sometimes this includes having them do things they are not at all interested in doing because they cannot see the good in doing so. Sometimes this means that they need correction and punishment. This also means that they learn responsibility through helping with the housework, indoors and out, helping with their siblings, etc.
So, in a nutshell, to me, unschooling means life without school. It has nothing to do with our parenting style as far as discipline goes, but other than that, it has EVERYTHING to do with it. We are not parents who sit on the sideline, and ask a few questions about our kids homework, because we haven't been with them for the past 7 hours. We are not just the kids' chaffuer to sports events where they hang out with their friends. We are not like the parents I heard about the other day: A recent study shows that most parents actually spend just 30 seconds of quality time with their children each day!
We define our unschooling lifestyle as watching over, helping with, and just plain being aware of most everything our children learn.
They are with us A LOT. We like it that way! And so far, that's what unschooling means to me!
Monday, August 07, 2006
A prayer about learning answered
This evening as we were sitting around the living room, (James, the kids, and I), a prayer that I prayed this morning was answered. It was answered yes, and pretty quickly!
I had prayed that God would allow our spiritual lives to be such a part of our everyday lives, that the children couldn't help but be inundated with all the spiritual knowledge we could share with them. James had been reading a little book to all 5 of them about some kittens for sale, but he of course made up his own words for the pictures that were much more interesting than the book, and had all five of them, ages 2 to 10, laughing. I had to get out the video camera for the last few pages. Then I picked up a book that I'd gotten from the kids section of the library as an intro to the history of money. I myself was curious about it, and figured it would be good info for the kids to know as well. So, even before I could begin reading it myself, I had Savannah, my 6 year old, and Travis my 8 year old, sitting beside me wanting me to read it to them. As I started reading, my 10 year old, Jesse became interested and followed along as well.
It ended with how only 8% of money in circulation is currently bills and coins. The other 92% is computer recorded transfers. Then we began discussing how the Bible talks about the number 666 being in the skin of the forehead or the hand and being used for money, and how the computer chip as big as a grain of rice is already being imbedded in people. Some use it even to open their house locks, and to pay for things.
This brought Jesse to worrying about how he wasn't sure he was comfortable with the idea of living forever, and how would that be? This led to an hour long discussion of eternity, heaven, and hell, what we might look and feel like in eternity, and then into, "How do we know what we believe is right?" This discussion about faith and evidence led Jesse to ask "How do we know we even have the right Bible?"
That question turned into a 10 to 15 minute history lesson from the 1500's to the 1600's, including King James, and how the King James Bible was written and translated from the Greek and Hebrew. During which James explained how all other Bibles were written in Latin so only the priests and such could read it. This was why King James wanted it in English, so that the common people could read it.
The mention of Latin prompted questions from both Jesse and Travis about the latin language. "Where did it come from?", "Who uses it or used it?", "What are some examples of Latin?"
I wish I'd written about this directly after the conversation so that the whole list of things we discussed could be recorded. But I had to read Jaidyn a story to keep her quiet so Dad and Jesse could continue discussing (and Travis could listen uninterrupted). Then I had to put her to bed. But at least for a while, I got to sit in on, and input some into an hour long (probably comparable to the best college lecture/discussions) discourse on Biblical history, Latin Language, spiritual belief, faith (what it is, and how it's used), vocabulary (Jesse learned the definition of many words including scholar), and got to see how much he already knew.
He knew the defenition of faith. We asked him what it was and confirmed it, and if Travis didn't know it already, he found out last night.
This entire conversation was held by Jesse, James, and Travis. James would stop talking, assuming that maybe Jesse wasn't interested anymore because he wasn't looking directly at him. Then Jesse would come up with another question. He'd just been sitting there contemplating what his dad was saying.
I felt privileged and excited to be the mom of such a family! A family who discusses important issues pertinent to our spiritual and physical lives. A family who shares our thoughts, not holding back for fear of anything. A family who allows our children to learn and grow as naturally as God intended them to. With our guidance, pointing them towards Him when they ask questions and are truly interested, NOT our shoving things down their throats that they are not ready for. I love our "unschooled" lives....
My learning about learning
Today I was reminded once again that human beings naturally learn - without the "help" of formal classes and/or workbooks. Conversations, reading books, everyday living: these are the best mediums for learning.
I was listening to a podcast while I was working out this morning. I've been feeling that social pressure of "your kids won't learn what they need to know without a class to teach them" in more than one area. As I listened to some of the posts on "unschooling" or "natural learning" as just plain real learning is commonly referred to, I was overwhelmed with the knowledge that there wasn't really a whole lot of planning that my husband and I really have to "do" to educate our children about life - physical, or spiritual.
The other day, I was asking my husband about what he does in his Sunday school classes with the kids. He teaches a small class each Sunday, and I was having a panic attack that our children weren't "getting what they needed."
"What is it that you want me to be telling them?", he asked. I thought. "Well, I guess about the major Bible stories...." "They already know a lot of those," he replied, "I want my Sunday school class NOT to be boring", he said. I thought about how our children learn "educational" things here at home, and I realized that spiritual teaching will take place the same way; through everyday conversation about how we live, through our reading and discussing the Bible, like when I am reading and something really sticks out to me, and I say, "Hey guys! This is really interesting!" And I set out to share what is exciting me. And because my excitement is contagious, they listen. And soak in information like sponges. MUCH more so than they would if they were listening to some dry lesson prepared by someone "trying to teach" them something. I know they are well intentioned, well thought out lesson plans. But they lack the realism of being pertinent to the moment. This is how humans learn! What matters to us at the moment sinks in and stays! Most of what we feel we "must learn" usually goes in one ear and out the other. (Unless of course we know we're being tested on it, and then it stays in between our ears long enough to do well on the test. Then it goes out the other side.)
So, I prayed as I was working out. I turned off the podcast for a few minutes, and I thanked God for showing me that learning spiritually doesn't have to be dry and hard to swallow or (as I was fearing) hard to share. Just like learning about anything else. I prayed that the Lord would help James and I to so intertwine our spiritual knowledge with our everyday lives that our children would be inundated with it. Soaked, immersed. This way, the idea of Sunday School being "necessary to a child's learning the Scriptures" seems ridiculous. The home is the place where a child will receive most of their spiritual knowledge, just like their "education".
I was listening to a podcast while I was working out this morning. I've been feeling that social pressure of "your kids won't learn what they need to know without a class to teach them" in more than one area. As I listened to some of the posts on "unschooling" or "natural learning" as just plain real learning is commonly referred to, I was overwhelmed with the knowledge that there wasn't really a whole lot of planning that my husband and I really have to "do" to educate our children about life - physical, or spiritual.
The other day, I was asking my husband about what he does in his Sunday school classes with the kids. He teaches a small class each Sunday, and I was having a panic attack that our children weren't "getting what they needed."
"What is it that you want me to be telling them?", he asked. I thought. "Well, I guess about the major Bible stories...." "They already know a lot of those," he replied, "I want my Sunday school class NOT to be boring", he said. I thought about how our children learn "educational" things here at home, and I realized that spiritual teaching will take place the same way; through everyday conversation about how we live, through our reading and discussing the Bible, like when I am reading and something really sticks out to me, and I say, "Hey guys! This is really interesting!" And I set out to share what is exciting me. And because my excitement is contagious, they listen. And soak in information like sponges. MUCH more so than they would if they were listening to some dry lesson prepared by someone "trying to teach" them something. I know they are well intentioned, well thought out lesson plans. But they lack the realism of being pertinent to the moment. This is how humans learn! What matters to us at the moment sinks in and stays! Most of what we feel we "must learn" usually goes in one ear and out the other. (Unless of course we know we're being tested on it, and then it stays in between our ears long enough to do well on the test. Then it goes out the other side.)
So, I prayed as I was working out. I turned off the podcast for a few minutes, and I thanked God for showing me that learning spiritually doesn't have to be dry and hard to swallow or (as I was fearing) hard to share. Just like learning about anything else. I prayed that the Lord would help James and I to so intertwine our spiritual knowledge with our everyday lives that our children would be inundated with it. Soaked, immersed. This way, the idea of Sunday School being "necessary to a child's learning the Scriptures" seems ridiculous. The home is the place where a child will receive most of their spiritual knowledge, just like their "education".
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